The 10 Most Insane Moments from the European Version of 'American Idol'
Ah, Eurovision. Is there a more ridiculous display of unintentional hilarity in the world? It's doubtful.
In case you don't know what Eurovision is, imagine a competition like American Idol in which each European nation picks an artist to represent it, but instead of kids doing cover songs, it's professional bands doing original songs. Also, the songs are mind-numbingly awful.
Of course, it's not all funny. Just 98 percent of it is. That's why it wasn't easy to compile this list of the 10 funniest performances of the 2007 Eurovision finals.
Ireland came in last place in this year's Eurovision, and... well, it's pretty easy to see why. You've got a warbling lead singer who can't even sway (not to mention sing), a walking cliché of a band straight out of the Ireland pavilion at Epcot Center, and a song that's not even worthy of the end credits in Lord of the Rings.
Plus, aren't Irish songs all about hoisting a pint and waving it left and right? "They Can't Stop the Spring" sounds like a lyric stolen from a failed C+C Music Factory song.
Romania's entry is a potent reminder of why you should never watch children's television while tweaked out of your mind on acid. Several weird-looking dudes sing "I love you" in different, possibly make-believe languages while a bald jester guy stands off to the side pondering, a Gregory Hines look-alike does some sort of awkward hip-hop thing, and a chef/mime walks around aimlessly. Faster and faster, suckier and suckier, it's like some awful hallucination scene from a Hunter S. Thompson novel.
Whoa, that intro does not prepare the audience for what's to come, does it? Everything starts off promisingly enough, with pyrotechnics and what sounds vaguely like rock, but then things quickly devolve into some sort of glam boogie-woogie nightmare that would make Freddie Mercury and Elton John blush.
And does the lead singer really need to take his shirt off to reveal his weird metal chestpatch? It's like he's wearing the opposite of Janet Jackson's nip-slip Super Bowl outfit. And how about those lyrics: "Words, I like to break 'em / Words, I like to shake 'em." Sweden: stick to death metal.
We're almost positive this song was in Castlevania; although this must be the techno remix. These misguided Slovenians probably chose a Nintendo song since the country is 20 years behind the rest of the world-it's probably new to them. What else would explain the ghetto surprise special effects: Christmas lights strapped to the lead singer's hand? At least she was able to work the extension cord into her outfit.
So here's the Serbs' winner. Yep, out of all the entries, this was supposedly the "best" one. Let's put aside the fact that the Death Cab for Cutie guy was called in as a ringer and focus on the important stuff, like what exactly are the backup transvestite pageant winners doing for the first two minutes? Apparently in Serbia, sulking and awkward touching are considered "choreography."








This entire article needs to be redone at this point.
ReplyA bunch of dead YouTube links. Fun!
ReplyAs other members have stated: Eurovision is not the European version of American Idol!
Reply Hide All See All 3 Replies1) "American" Idol is a spin-off of a British show (called Pop Idol) from 2001.
2) Pop Idol itself is loosely of a show from New Zealand (c. 1999) called Popstars. (Yes, all one word.)
3) The Eurovision Song Contest is unrelated to either and started 1956.
If you want to make fun the ESC, fine. We Brits do it all the time.
But get your facts right. It's not that difficult.
If you want to correct others' mistakes, fine. But there's no mistake to be corrected. They didn't say, "It's the European version of American Idol." He said, "In case you don't know what Eurovision is, imagine a competition LIKE American Idol." That is clearly to give context to people who have never seen or heard of the show.
Maybe you should READ before you start correcting people. It's not that difficult!
@Nuala: The title of this article is "The 10 Most Insane Moments from the European Version of 'American Idol".
except, Nuala7, it's pretty much nothing like american idol...
...it's far less dignified.
you should change the links considering that they're no longer available due to stupid infringement claims. I'm an amercan and i've never heard of eurovision before reading this article. I hate American Idol and was hesitant about looking up these clips. However, after seeing most of the clips, I'd have to say that your analysis was way off. The Belarus - "Work Your Magic" was amazing! not just for the spectacle of it, but the singing was great -in the structuring of the lyrics and in the delivery- especially for someone who isn't from an english-speaking country. Furthermore, I'm typing all this while dancing to Ukraine's Verka Serduchka Dancing song.I guess I should thank you though for increasing my playlist videos on Youtube.
ReplyOh no!! They removed the account with the vids... now my life is forfeit!
ReplyAlso, f**k YEAH LORDI!!
Well, at least Eurovision had Lordi, meaning it is 7777777% better than American Idol.
ReplyThey removed the account for the videos.
ReplyUm, sure, I can agree to why some of these songs are on here, but writing off one of the most beautiful songs ever featured in Eurovision (that would be 'Molitva') because of the backing choreography is really stupid.
ReplyAlso, Eurovision is not the "European Version of American Idol"................ Not everything in the world centres around America, funnily enough..
Don't tell the Americans but American Idol was originally a UK show, and the best act on their "show" pales into insignificance next to the wonder that is Eurovision!
Eurovision isn't the European version of American Idol (incidentally American Idol was the American version of, now defunct, British TV Show Pop Idol). Good article though
ReplyI can't believe this actually wasn't researched.
Verka Serduchka!!!
ReplyThat's awesome!!!
not a single one of these videos worked..........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
Replynot a single one of these videos worked.........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
Replyyou actually wanted to watch them?
i appreciate the article for bringing these to my attention (i looked them all up on youtube. worth it). author is only pretending not to love every minute of this. cause who wouldn't?
ReplyArticles like this are why I'm embarrased to be American most of the time... my countrymen are idiots who have no concept of the cultures that exist outside their pizza-box lives. As soon as I get that travel visa... goodbye USA. And in pre-response to the inevitable insult, I won't miss you either.
Replygood for you buddy, I'm still enjoying myself and you are not. That's what this site is about, so stop coming here.
I wouldn't call the Eurovision contest a display of "culture". Were I Swiss, I'd be terribly embarrassed if the rest of the world thought the 2007 entry was representative of over a millennium of Swiss culture.
What's the point of having videos if you can't watch them? Either find the videos or delete the article, because this is a miserable little list.
ReplySeriously? q***r is a no-no word, but the website can call people trannies? Cracked: For hypocritical writing rules & broken links. Boo.
ReplyNot only is "Death Cab for Cutie Guy" female, she's got an amazing voice and is an open lesbian. That's pretty impressive considering that Serbia doesn't have a Gay Pride celebration because sadly, many Serbs are homophobic. So the sulking, and the awkward touching is actually a socio-political commentary on q***r Rights in a country where the q***r community have no rights.
ReplyLiterally none of these videos work anymore.
ReplyWhat more do you expect from Sweden? They gave us bloody Caramelldansen
ReplyThis is eurovision.
Reply