Cracked Archive - News
11 Events That Have Happened As Many Times As President Trump Has Been Impeached
To paraphrase Phineas and Ferb's Evil Dr. Doofenshmirtz --
16
- By Carly Tennes
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- January 14, 2021
Brands ... Leave The Slacktivism To Your Personal Accounts
Just as much as a can of Pepsi isn't the cure for racism, a can of Coke isn't a fix for democracy.
33
- By Max Mitchem
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- January 14, 2021
Hey, At Least We Won't See Political Ads on Google For The Next Week
8
- By Carly Tennes
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- January 13, 2021
Lectern Thief's Lawyer On Explaining That Incriminating Photo: 'I'm Not a Magician'
'But your honor, I only posed for a photo with a stolen podium during a deadly attack on the U.S. capitol!'
62
- By Carly Tennes
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- January 13, 2021
'Buffalo Head Guy' Reportedly Hasn't Eaten Since Capitol Attack Arrest, Citing Lack Of Organic Jail Food
'No red M&Ms' requests -- they're for insurgents, too!
66
- By Carly Tennes
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- January 12, 2021
Some Douchecanoe Carved 'Trump' Into a Poor Manatee
Make America Great Again ... by mutilating vulnerable marine life?
45
- By Carly Tennes
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- January 12, 2021
President Trump Gets Trolled On State Dept Website, Fingers Point To Angry Employee
14
- By Carly Tennes
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- January 11, 2021
Satisfying! Insurgents Involved In Capitol Attack Face Repercussions
Damn, that's crazy. Alexa, play 'That's What You Get
119
- By Carly Tennes
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- January 11, 2021
The Creepy True Story Of Japan's Twitter Serial Killer
Even by true crime standards, this story is dark.
26
- By Ryan Menezes
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- January 11, 2021
BREAKING: President Trump Is Now Permanently Banned From Twitter
It only took 1449 days ...
140
- By Carly Tennes
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- January 08, 2021
TikTok Teens Hope Capitol Attack Serves As A Wake Up Call To Congress To Act On School Shootings
Congressional Representatives, they're (now) just like TikTok teens!
54
- By Carly Tennes
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- January 08, 2021
Capitol-Sieging Yahoos Include Britney Spears' ex, Washed-Up Indie Boy
31
- By Carly Tennes
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- January 07, 2021
Sorry, Twitter! 'Via Getty' Isn't The Name of Lectern-Stealing Rioter
33
- By Carly Tennes
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- January 07, 2021
The Far-Right Siege of Congress -- As Told To The Tune of 'We Didn't Start The Fire'
We lit another fire ...
53
- By Carly Tennes
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- January 07, 2021
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