‘You know something I found out? When you’re on fire and running down the street, people will get out of your way. Except for one old drunk, he’s going, ‘Can I get a light? How about it? Just a little off the sleeve. Okay?’’
Whether it’s making us bust a gut by being the ‘wooooorst’ twin sister in Pawnee, Indiana, or clutch at our heartstrings with just her voice giving life to a shell with shoes, Slate’s presence is always an addition, never a subtraction
‘There is something refreshingly ironic about people lying on the beach contracting skin cancer in an attempt to acquire a purely illusory appearance of good health, while germ-laden medical waste washes up on the sand all around them’
“The lamest crime is loitering. You imagine a guy with a 30-page rap sheet that’s all loitering. What do you do with a guy like that? Throw him in jail, where he can’t go anywhere?”
‘How am I gonna stop texting? Don’t say, ‘Don’t text,’ ‘cause you can’t tell somebody who keeps texting, ‘Don’t text!’ Oh, delete the number? What am I gonna do, delete my brain?’
‘How long until someone on television points out that during the COVID shutdown, the folks in Washington were apparently doing at home what Washington has been accused of doing to the American people?’
