Cracked Archive - News

God Save The Queen: The Boeing 747 Is Quietly Retiring
God Save The Queen: The Boeing 747 Is Quietly Retiring

It's a sad retirement for the Queen of the Skies, made sadder by the fact that we didn't get to fully prepare for it.

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Traffic Is Light, So One Guy Took Advantage To Drive Like A Maniac
Traffic Is Light, So One Guy Took Advantage To Drive Like A Maniac

Here's a guy who has used social distancing to make a million dollars disappear in the blink of an eye.

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Pharma Bro Wants A Crack At This (And Out Of Prison)
Pharma Bro Wants A Crack At This (And Out Of Prison)

What is this, some kind of Shkreli Squad?

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Idiots Are Risking It All Right Now For Cigarettes
Idiots Are Risking It All Right Now For Cigarettes

Tobacco is getting people to do some pretty stupid things right now.

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The White House Briefings Are Beyond Useless
The White House Briefings Are Beyond Useless

The White House Press briefings leave more questions unanswered than the Lost finale.

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For The Love Of God, Can We Just Legalize Weed Now?
For The Love Of God, Can We Just Legalize Weed Now?

Shouldn't we just legalize weed already?

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Cell Tower Conspiracy Theory Is A Doozy
Cell Tower Conspiracy Theory Is A Doozy

This might be the new champion of dumb conspiracy theories.

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Industries Left In Shambles By All This
Industries Left In Shambles By All This

Not every one is getting a bail out.

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Bill De Blasio Is The Dumbest Man In NYC
Bill De Blasio Is The Dumbest Man In NYC

When it comes to dealing with the coronavirus Bill de Blasio has been a one-man three stooges routine.

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Sorry, NYC Typhoid Morons, Go Drink At Home
Sorry, NYC Typhoid Morons, Go Drink At Home

Let's plague this joint.

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Working For McDonalds Is Going To Get Even More Annoying But It's For The Best
Working For McDonalds Is Going To Get Even More Annoying But It's For The Best

McDonalds is going to start implementing routine temperature checks, which sucks, but also that's life right now.

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Stealing A Van Gogh Is Easy Now, Apparently
Stealing A Van Gogh Is Easy Now, Apparently

The painting as been released from quarantine.

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The Science Behind The Fear Our Brains Create For Us
The Science Behind The Fear Our Brains Create For Us

Your brain is kind of a dick, but it means well.

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