Cracked Archive - News
The First Living Robots Are Some 'Jurassic Park' BS
Long live Frogbot.
- By Amanda Mannen
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- January 15, 2020
Here's Why Bernie Sanders And Elizabeth Warren Are Fighting
Can anti-war candidates go to war? It sure seems like they just did.
- By Adam Wears
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- January 15, 2020
The Horny Tortoise Who Saved His Species Is A Fraud
All hail tortoise sex god E5!
- By Luis Prada
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- January 14, 2020
5 'Ugh' Trump Stories The News Totally Forgot About
We're so inundated with Trump news that we shrug off scandals that would tank any other president.
- By E.M. Caris
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- January 11, 2020
Sorry Texas, But No One Needs To Learn Cursive Ever Again
Let's bring back the telegraph while we're at it.
- By Luis Prada
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- January 09, 2020
5 Heroic Sacrifices By Real-Life Action Heroes
Get on this, Hollywood.
- By Ryan Menezes
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- January 09, 2020
Medical Marijuana Is Apparently A Joke To Ohio Football Fans
Bad marijuana is not a good solution to bad football.
- By Isaac Cabe
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- January 08, 2020
What The Wienermobile Says About The Modern Economy
You need a degree to drive a hot dog because that's where we're at.
- By Amanda Mannen
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- January 08, 2020
4 Crapsack Things That Are Still Legal In The USA
The year is 2020.
- By Mark Hill
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- January 07, 2020
Flight Attendants' Uniforms Are Making Them Sick (Again)
It's apparently hard to make fly-looking clothing that won't make the flight attendants incredibly sick.
- By Isaac Cabe
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- January 06, 2020
5 Pointless And Awful Government Sting Operations
Sometimes to catch a criminal you have to become a criminal yourself.
- By Ryan Menezes
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- January 05, 2020
Michelin Beat A Chef's Lawsuit, And That's A Big Deal
Losing a Michelin star sucks, losing a court case over it is much, much worse.
- By Isaac Cabe
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- January 02, 2020
6 Conspiracy Theories That Had 'Yikes' Real-World Effects
The craziest theories have a disturbing way of spilling over into real life.
- By Alex Hanton
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- December 28, 2019
4 Viral Stories With The Weirdest Plot Twists
Things get crazy when the spotlight goes out.
- By Adam Wears
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- December 23, 2019
Sea Lions Commandeer Ship, Declare War On Mankind
We need YOU to scare off 2,000 pounds of blubber.
- By Cedric Voets
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- December 20, 2019
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