Cracked Archive - News

People, We Need To Wash Our Hands To Stop Spreading Coronavirus (Not All The Other Stupid Crap You're Doing)

It’s trendy to have coronavirus right now, but if someone offers it to you, just say no.


'Extreme' Political Viewpoints (That Really Aren't)

Progressive policies actually work quite well in the rest of the world.


5 Hilarious Ways Drones Are Doing Good (Seriously)

See? Sometimes drones can be good.


Costco Food Courts Go Behind A Paywall March 16th: So Long Cheap Hotdogs, Non-Members

There's a lot of great memories attached to the Costco food court, and that's all about to go behind a paywall.


IKEA Is Producing Weird Audio Porn Now

Slam your genitals in as many consenting drawers as you want, but don't pretend it's making them cleaner.


The 5 Most Garbage Democrats In Congress

Just look at these asses.


If Your Significant Other Needs A McDonald's Scented Candle, Now's The Time

To those about to beef: We salute you.


An Announcement From Jason 'David Wong' Pargin (He Does Not Die At The End)

It's important Cracked announcement time, folks.


Burger King Is Embracing Mold Now

There's more mold in this new Burger King commercial than your ex-boyfriend's shower.


Please, For The Love Of God, Don't Take Financial Advice From Jake Paul

Oh, God, please, we're begging you.


The Boy Scouts Of America Runs Out Of Pedophile Funds, Declares Bankruptcy

Always be prepared to lowball victims.


5 Monopolies That Hate The Average American

(Fixed rate) power to the people!


Real, Weirdo Video Games Starring The 2020 Presidential Candidates

Time to drop into gaming's deepest, lamest, weirdest corners.