Cracked Archive - News

Coronavirus Porn Is Here

The power of the human boner cannot be suppressed.

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Covid-19 Is Exposing Xenophobia

Always spew racist nonsense into your elbow and away from people.

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Little-Known Reasons Ivy League Schools Are Greedy, Elitist Nightmares

You might not want to know what it's like, unless you're male, upper-clase and white.

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Crowd-Pleasing Twists In Big-Time Scandals

Sometimes life manages a satisfying narrative arc.

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Why The U.S. Housing Market Is An Unaffordable Nightmare

Even though we don't technically have a housing shortage. (Just an AFFORDABLE housing shortage.)

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Coronavirus Side Stories That Prove This Entire Crisis Is Weird AF

We read the news today, oh boy.

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Unexpected (Positive) Aspects Of Tragic Events

Like nature's consolation prize.

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5 Of The Most Insane Hostage Rescues In History

Real hostage situations get way crazier than you think.

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Reasons Presidential Debates Are Irrelevant

The way these debates are held today renders them almost completely pointless.

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People, We Need To Wash Our Hands To Stop Spreading Coronavirus (Not All The Other Stupid Crap You're Doing)

It’s trendy to have coronavirus right now, but if someone offers it to you, just say no.

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'Extreme' Political Viewpoints (That Really Aren't)

Progressive policies actually work quite well in the rest of the world.

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