Alex Jones Is Filing For Bankruptcy: We Love To See It

This news... this news fills me with a deep satisfaction.
Alex Jones Is Filing For Bankruptcy: We Love To See It

It feels rarer and rarer these days that we ever get the true cathartic release of someone facing the full brunt of consequences for their actions. Especially when it comes to the practitioners of the circus act that’s become the right wing of the American political scene, we’ve been conditioned to expect slaps on wrists or settled cases. A large part of the nation spent the vast majority of Donald Trump’s presidency desperately refreshing half-reliable twitter accounts hoping for some sort of white house press release informing everyone that regretfully, the president was going to be beheaded for treason. It broke some people’s brains on there, making them add a bunch of confusing symbolic emojis to their display name and spend 10 hours a day replying to news tweets with the Jesse Pinkman “he can’t keep getting away with this” GIF.

That’s why checking the news today to find that Alex Jones is filing for bankruptcy as a result of the numerous lawsuits brought against him by Sandy Hook families was so deeply satisfying. It was a few moments of justice and peace in a rapidly decaying world. If Lush could concentrate the energy of finding out that Alex Jones is declaring for bankruptcy and compress it into a bath bomb it would be their all-time best seller. This is mental ambrosia. It’s so satisfying it almost makes me want to read the court documents behind it.

Woman arms outspread towards sun


Me receiving this glorious news.

Now I’m sure that the celebrations over this development on twitter and social media is going to get hit with a lot of replies by people with usernames like “logicwarrior” or “Fired4Truth”. These people are going to say things like “it’s a dark day when people are celebrating an attack on free speech.” They’ll probably also say things like “This sets a dangerous precedent.” There is nothing those accounts love more than the word precedent.  

Here’s the thing: no it doesn’t, and shut up. It’s a defamation lawsuit for reporting untrue facts about named parties. That #$%$ has been around forever. People have twisted the first amendment into such an unrecognizable gordian knot that now somehow bald-faced lying on the record is supposed to be constitutionally protected. If these chuds want Infowars and whatever else to be considered real news, congratulations, they’re now subject to the same journalistic standards and legal exposure as real newspapers. And it is my right to enjoy every moment of it.

Top Image: Sean P Anderson/Pixabay

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