15 Weird Bits Of News That Make Our High School Selves Look Normal

The one constant in life is the 99 cent AriZona iced tea.
15 Weird Bits Of News That Make Our High School Selves Look Normal

"I've always had a hard time understanding spellcasting" thought the man, who was not yet a wizard. He'd been sitting alone for several hours in front of an enormous book, but he'd only just now gotten to the part about curses being cast on the innocent because someone didn't stop to help someone in distress. He had been reading it all night, which was why he was still wearing the same robe he had put on before he went to bed and why there was a half-drunk cup of tea in front of him, untouched.

It had taken him so long to read that far into this particular book, and yet, as far as he'd gotten, it hadn't seemed like he'd made any real progress. It was just that he couldn't make heads or tails of the section about how to dispel curses cast on the innocent. The section was just a list of fifteen odd facts, and it went:

Brazil has the hardest military in the world.

WEIRD WORLD The Brazilian military supplied viagra and penile implants for its troops, as citizens struggled to get medicine. LARGADA After revelations that the Brazilian military had bought Viagra for its troops, a lawmaker claimed it had also acquired 60 inflatable silicone penile implants for reasons that were not divulged. CRACKED.COM


A squatter is refusing to leave a home even as it’s being sold.

WEIRD WORLD A home in Washington is being sold with the caveat that you never visit the person living in the bottom level. The listing for the $800k home states, home will convey with a person(s) living in lower level with no lease in place. The lower level resident is a squatter that has set up shop for three years. CRACKED.COM


The death of a man found in his home with 24 caged snakes has been ruled an accident.

WEIRD WORLD The death of a man found in his home with 124 caged snakes has been ruled an accident. 49-year-old David Riston was found dead by, you guessed it, a snake bite. The snakes in his home included rattlesnakes, cobras, black mambas and a 14-foot-long Burmese python. CRACKED.COM


The one constant in life is the 99 cent AriZona iced tea.

WEIRD WORLD Despite the rise of costs of other goods, the AriZona CEO refuses to raise the price of their iced tea. ORIGINAL GreenT with HONEY 500 ATIZA The 23 ounce cans have been 99 cents for 30 years, and no amount of inflation or rising costs of materials can force billionaire CEO Don Vultaggio to change that. CRACKED.COM


Death by firing squad is back on the menu in SC.

WEIRD WORLD South Carolina is ready to use a firing squad to carry out executions. Lucky death row inmates will have their choice of death by electric chair or firing squad, after a decade-long pause in executions attributed to the agency's inability to procure lethal injection drugs. CRACKED.COM


Disney music was used to make footage of a police officer harder to post online.

WEIRD WORLD A police officer used copyrighted Disney music to thwart a YouTuber who was recording him. Randy Newman's You've Got a Friend in Me was played from a police vehicle while a citizen was recording the public interaction so that the YouTuber's video would be muted or taken down. CRACKED.COM


A new bike lane is being called a "clear getaway" to criminals.

WEIRD WORLD Business owners are complaining that a newly planned cycle lane will be used as a getaway for shoplifters. One worker from a bed and mattress shop said the cycle lane would be a nightmare for their business, which somehow is under attack by people who steal mattresses and ride away on their bikes. CRACKED.COM


The man accused of shooting Lady Gaga’s dog walker was accidentally let out of jail.

WEIRD WORLD The man accused of shooting Lady Gaga's dog walker was accidentally let out of jail. Due to a clerical error, James Howard Jackson was released from the jail in Los Angeles he was being held in for his role in the assault of Ryan Fischer as he walked Gaga's dogs. CRACKED.COM

Sky News

Hitler was used as an example of how the homeless can use their situation to their advantage.

WEIRD WORLD A senator used Adolf Hitler as an example of inspiration and hope for the homeless. 4F During a speech on the floor of the state's upper chamber, Tennessee state Sen. Frank Niceley said that in 1910, Hitler took to the streets and practiced his oratory and his people skills. CRACKED.COM

The Hill 

A sword-cane was turned over after accidentally being brought to an airport.

WEIRD WORLD A man unknowingly brought a sword-cane through airport security. The man surrendered the hidden weapon at Boston's Logan International Airport, after telling TSA agents he had no idea a blade was concealed in his cane. CRACKED.COM


Hertz will stop putting the hurt on its customers.

WEIRD WORLD The Hertz rental car company is committed to stop false arrests of its customers. OLICE ICE The new Hertz CEO Stephen Scherr has publicly admitted for the first time, after a decade of dodging these claims, that some customers have been arrested for driving cars they rented. CRACKED.COM


The wrong house was torn down in Alabama.

WEIRD WORLD A construction company demolished the wrong house in Alabama. Jennifer Pulliam is taking legal action after her childhood home, that's been in her family since the '60s, was torn down by mistake in January. CRACKED.COM


A self-driving car was pulled over and fled the traffic stop.

WEIRD WORLD A driverless car fled the scene after being pulled over by police. VINGINGTON - FP - 5235 San Francisco police stopped one of Cruise's autonomous Chevrolet Bolt EVs for not having its headlights on. The car took off a few hundred feet after the officer noticed there was no driver. CRACKED.COM

ARS Technica 

Florida’s governor has been given power to gerrymander as he pleases.

WEIRD WORLD Ron DeSantis is going to personally map Florida Congressional districts. Florida's legislative branch has given Governor Ron DeSantis the power to gerrymander the twenty-eight congressional districts of Florida to whatever his liking. CRACKED.COM

The Mountain

It’s like the 4 minute mile, but really very different and not like it at all.

WEIRD WORLD The sub 1-minute hanging up 10 articles of clothing has finally been achieved. A father and son team took the record in London, successfully hanging pants, jackets, and shirts on hangers at a blistering pace, with a time of 56.87 seconds. CRACKED.COM


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