Cracked Archive - News

Correction: President Trump Pardoned Steve Bannon After All
Well, that happened.
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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14
How President Trump Will Spend His Last Hours as Commander in Chief
One more day ...
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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68
President Trump Will Reportedly Issue 100 Pardons, Commutations During His Last Full Day In Office
Yep, definitely *not* a suspicious move from someone who was impeached twice ...
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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33
'Burn After Reading' Predicted Part of This Mess
'The Simpsons' has some stiff competition on its hands in terms of predicting the future....
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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14
5 Dumb Garbage Conspiracy Theories Spreading Right Now
2020 is over, but the garbage conspiracies it helped unleash remain.
- Authors
- By Zanandi Botes
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62
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4 Media Musings From The End of Donald Trump's America
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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49
Confederate Flag-Wielding Insurgent Surrenders, Surprise Surprise
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- By Carly Tennes
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50
Rudy Watch: 'Borat 2' Star Giuliani Faces Consequences of His Actions, Trump's Wrath
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- By Carly Tennes
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21
4 Reasons the Guy Who Runs CNN is a Supervillain (Basically)
Meet the bozo who turned American politics into Game of Thrones.
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- By Mark Hill
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48
11 Events That Have Happened As Many Times As President Trump Has Been Impeached
To paraphrase Phineas and Ferb's Evil Dr. Doofenshmirtz --
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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15
Brands ... Leave The Slacktivism To Your Personal Accounts
Just as much as a can of Pepsi isn't the cure for racism, a can of Coke isn't a fix for democracy.
- Authors
- By Max Mitchem
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33
Hey, At Least We Won't See Political Ads on Google For The Next Week
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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7
Lectern Thief's Lawyer On Explaining That Incriminating Photo: 'I'm Not a Magician'
'But your honor, I only posed for a photo with a stolen podium during a deadly attack on the U.S. capitol!'
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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59
'Buffalo Head Guy' Reportedly Hasn't Eaten Since Capitol Attack Arrest, Citing Lack Of Organic Jail Food
'No red M&Ms' requests -- they're for insurgents, too!
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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64
Some Douchecanoe Carved 'Trump' Into a Poor Manatee
Make America Great Again ... by mutilating vulnerable marine life?
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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41