Writer and editor for niche website Cracked.com. I am definitely not a shaved bear. For more attempts at witticisms and my personal recipes for toilet wine, do follow me @cedricvoets.
Nicolas Cage Went On A Weird Crusade To Find The Holy Grail Somehow not even the craziest thing he did that week. Authors By Cedric Voets Published August 09, 2019
Robots Stealing Human Jobs, Many Humans Weirdly OK With It Welcome, robot overlords? Authors By Cedric Voets Published August 07, 2019
Overwatch Is Doubling Down On Its Mentally Ill Villain Foot fetishists rejoice, but no one else. Authors By Cedric Voets Published August 05, 2019
Everyone's A Dummy In The 'Game Of Thrones' Finale Script Boy howdy, this is not high-quality drama. Authors By Cedric Voets Published August 02, 2019
So, Hollywood's Making A New 'Dungeons And Dragons' Movie Needs more Irons, specifically of the Jeremy variety. Authors By Cedric Voets Published July 31, 2019
Orlando Bloom Won't Be In The Lord Of The Rings (That's Bad) He's not the ageless loverboy we want out of our prequels. Authors By Cedric Voets Published July 29, 2019
'Mad Max: Fury Road' Is Finally Getting Sequels Perhaps we should have witnessed a smidge bit more. Authors By Cedric Voets Published July 26, 2019
Jojo Rabbit Trailer Proves You Can Still Make 'Those' Films Apparently, you CAN make that kind of movie today. Authors By Cedric Voets Published July 24, 2019
'Endgame' Is Finally The Biggest Movie Ever, Happy Now? We've seen small town beauty queen pageants less desperate. Authors By Cedric Voets Published July 22, 2019
We're Pretty Sure The New 'Cats' Movie Is A War Crime Watching the trailer will make you hiss-terical with fear. Authors By Cedric Voets Published July 19, 2019
Poll: American Kids Want To Be YouTubers, Not Astronauts Neither steps or leaps required for sitting behind a webcam all day. Authors By Cedric Voets Published July 17, 2019
The New 'Lion King' Is The Future Of Movies, In A Creepy Way The reviews are as irrelevant as traditional filmmaking is about to be. Authors By Cedric Voets Published July 15, 2019
The Already-Forgotten Momo Challenge Spawns Two New Movies She can barely support her own head, but she'll carry two whole movies. Authors By Cedric Voets Published July 12, 2019
For $1,200 A Month, You Too Can Live In A Tech Bro Flophouse Sometimes you have to disrupt the slumlord industry. Authors By Cedric Voets Published July 10, 2019
Disney's New Cartoons Turn Goofy Into An Abomination I have not mouth yet I must yaaaaaaa-hoo-hoo-hoo-hooey! Authors By Cedric Voets Published July 08, 2019
Racists Are Attacking Black Ariel With Mermaid Science Preserving the Mermaryan nation. Authors By Cedric Voets Published July 05, 2019
The Blackadder Reboot Sounds Like A Stale Sitcom For Boomers Nobody wants to see Edmund Blackadder complaining about avocado toast. Authors By Cedric Voets Published July 03, 2019
The Makers Of 'The Room' Have A New Show And It Doesn't Suck The worst Tommy Wiseau makes the best art. Authors By Cedric Voets Published July 01, 2019
Cate Blanchett Is Secretly In All Of Your Favorite Movies But if you want to see her you'll spend a long time looking -- which isn't a bad thing. Authors By Cedric Voets Published June 28, 2019
Here's A Contender For The Dumbest Gaming Hot Take Of 2019 Old media yells at cloud, saves gaming? Authors By Cedric Voets Published June 26, 2019
