Cracked Archive - News

Amazon’s Price Hike Is A Good Time To Remember Amazon Sucks

Maybe all that money can go to giving Amazon workers some bathroom breaks


Luigi Gets A Bulge (And Other News That’s Weird AF)

The world is just getting weirder, which is oddly comforting.


5 Insane Small-Town News Stories You Need To Know About

Every now and then, a story that affects the whole world starts unfolding right in the peaceful heart of Nowhere In Particular.


The Queen Has Her Own Private (Creepy) Pet Cemetery

She might look all sweet and innocent, but Her Majesty has a dark secret.


Britain Just Created An Immigration Crisis Dumber Than DACA

It's hard to top the boneheaded antics of the Trump administration when it comes to immigration, but Britain is certainly trying its best right now.


Katy's Gut, Arnie's Heart, & Other Celeb Parts Making News

Celebrities being wacky is one of the constants in the universe.


When Somebody Else's Identity Theft Scam Gets You Arrested

Criminal identity theft is regular identify theft's ugly cousin, and involves someone getting caught doing a crime while using your name, and then you get the blame. So, what happens next?


13 Myths About Society Too Many People Believe

I am to science what Albert Einstein was to trap music.


Foldable Phones, Smart Porn, And Other Breaking Tech News

Here’s what the machines are up to, this week.


What If Your Job Paid You To Do Absolutely Nothing?

Whether you would regard this as a vacation or a living hell probably says a lot about your personality.


Stop Thinking About Trump's Dong, You Maniacs

We're only a short time away from seeing what President Donald Jayden Trump looks like when he's doin' the do.


Baby Groot Isn't Groot, And Other Startling Hollywood News

We’re here to help you keep up with the torrent of Hollywood news.


Millions Of Americans Go To Mexico When They Need Healthcare

How much does healthcare cost in the USA?


Birth Control Pills For Men & More Life-Changing Health News

Look out guys, we’re about to mess with your T.


Life In An American City Where Cars Are Banned

Mackinac, where horses and bicycles are kings and cars are unwelcome beasts.