Cracked Archive - News
Brands ... Leave The Slacktivism To Your Personal Accounts
Just as much as a can of Pepsi isn't the cure for racism, a can of Coke isn't a fix for democracy.
- Authors
- By Max Mitchem
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33
33 Hey, At Least We Won't See Political Ads on Google For The Next Week
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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- 7
Lectern Thief's Lawyer On Explaining That Incriminating Photo: 'I'm Not a Magician'
'But your honor, I only posed for a photo with a stolen podium during a deadly attack on the U.S. capitol!'
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
- Published
- Comments
- 59
'Buffalo Head Guy' Reportedly Hasn't Eaten Since Capitol Attack Arrest, Citing Lack Of Organic Jail Food
'No red M&Ms' requests -- they're for insurgents, too!
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
- Published
- Comments
- 64
Some Douchecanoe Carved 'Trump' Into a Poor Manatee
Make America Great Again ... by mutilating vulnerable marine life?
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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- 41
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Sorry, Donnie! Parler May Be Down For Quite Some Time
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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- 74
President Trump Gets Trolled On State Dept Website, Fingers Point To Angry Employee
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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- Comments
- 13
Satisfying! Insurgents Involved In Capitol Attack Face Repercussions
Damn, that's crazy. Alexa, play 'That's What You Get
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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- 110
The Creepy True Story Of Japan's Twitter Serial Killer
Even by true crime standards, this story is dark.
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- By Ryan Menezes
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- 24
BREAKING: President Trump Is Now Permanently Banned From Twitter
It only took 1449 days ...
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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- 127
TikTok Teens Hope Capitol Attack Serves As A Wake Up Call To Congress To Act On School Shootings
Congressional Representatives, they're (now) just like TikTok teens!
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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- 50
Capitol-Sieging Yahoos Include Britney Spears' ex, Washed-Up Indie Boy
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- By Carly Tennes
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- 30
Sorry, Twitter! 'Via Getty' Isn't The Name of Lectern-Stealing Rioter
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- By Carly Tennes
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- 33
The Far-Right Siege of Congress -- As Told To The Tune of 'We Didn't Start The Fire'
We lit another fire ...
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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- 52
Breaking: President Donald Trump's Actions Actually Have Dangerous Consequences
We can do better, America.
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
- Published
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- 173
