Cracked Archive - Celebrities


14 Images That Powerful People Don't Want You to See

Every famous person has an image that they carefully crafted over the course of their career. But what happens when you look years before that career began?


20 Viral Images Made Filthy by Censorship

It's amazing how a tiny blur can change the context of an entire image.


Where Aren't They Now? 16 Overlooked Deaths from 2013

Every year we like to stop and remember those whose passing didn't make headlines, despite the fact that each changed your life in some small way.


21 Celebrity Origin Stories That Would Explain Everything

Sometimes, a star emerges and we are just baffled as to where they came from.


Reagan's Legacy, Based Only on His Appearance in Comic Books

Here are some excerpts from the Ronald Reagan biography I composed using only comic books as my guide.


The 5 Most Undeservedly Hated Famous People of 2013

It's December, which means fans should brace themselves for an onslaught of lists of the best and worst things of the year that has almost passed.


26 Famous People Before They Were Photoshopped

It turns out the photoshopper in the entourage has it the worst.


10 Celebrity-Themed Sex Positions (Part 3)

Settle in with your oils and prepare for the third installment of celebrity sex positions.


5 Hilariously Bizarre Early Careers of Famous People

Before your favorite actors, musicians, and TV personalities got their big break, they had to work for a living just like the rest of us schlubs.


5 Famous Actors Who Hate Their Most Iconic Roles

It turns out being a sex symbol isn't all it cracked up to be.


7 'Saved By the Bell' Plots That Prove Zack Is a Sociopath

If Zack isn't doing something heartlessly self-serving, he isn't breathing.


5 Celebrities You Didn't Know Ass-Kicked Their Way to Fame

The next time you see a celebrity walking down the red carpet surrounded by scary-looking guys in black suits, pay attention to those muscleheads: One of them could become the next big thing.


5 Pop Culture Images That Warped Our Psyches for Life

Even if you're not like me, even if these images have no meaning for you, then at the very least, I have met my deadline, and isn't that all that really matters?


18 WTF Post-Fame Lives of Former Celebrities

It turns out the limelight just isn't big enough for everyone.


4 Most Horrifying Marriages Between Fans and Their Idols

Falling in love with your idol is a dream come true. A dream that should have been reported to police immediately.