Everybody acts like living in crime-ridden movie dystopias like Mega-City One from Dredd or Washington, D.C. from Minority Report would be SO bad. But we did the math, and it'd be fine (if it weren't for all the cops).
"The abortion I had as a teenager was the hardest decision of my life, one that caused me anguish then and that saddens me even now, but it was the path to the life full of joy and love that I have experienced," Thurman wrote.
If there's one thing Cracked is definitively known for, aside from existing as the sole comedy website throughout the entire internet, it's our expert fashion reviews. It's common knowledge that our sense of style is so impeccably intimidating that the entire staff of Vogue – including its bobbed, allegedly Devil Wears Prada-inspiring overlord, Anna Wintour -- can't help but shake in their Balenciaga boots the morning after every major fashion event, anticipating our scathing critiques. As such, we've decided to break down the wildest looks of Monday night's Met Gala, rating them by metrics we literally made up on the spot.
From Cara Delevingne's “Peg The Patriarchy” vest to Frank Ocean's creepy, green robot baby, here are the best and worst looks of the Met Gala.
If somebody once told me Frank Ocean's Met Gala look was gonna roll me, I would tell them they “ain't the sharpest tool in the shed." Yet when he first hit the red carpet, it seemed Frank Ocean had us all lookin' kinda dumb…founded as he headed up the stairs with a green, robotic baby on his hip, his definitely-not-nightmare-inducing pal clad in a cool-toned geometric snowsuit and a pair of shimmering baby-grills (?) amid the event's 80-degree temperatures.
Upon a closer look, however, it seems there was in fact a method to Ocean's madness – one that may have really just been a big Shrek joke. Sporting a black Prada jacket and a diamond necklace from his label, Homer (which also dressed pop star Rosalía and actor Evan Mock for the event) Ocean completed the look with an ogre-green buzz cut and an embroidered baseball cap with a play on the DreamWorks logo, featuring a man fishing on a crescent moon above the word “DreamCore.”
With his subtle nod to our favorite fictional, onion-like swamp-dweller, Ocean's look has truly reiterated his All-Star status – almost making up for the fact that he hasn't dropped an album since 2016, which he should really, really do something about.
OFFICIAL CRACKED RATING: 5/5 Super Rich (creepy Shrek robot) Kids