On many occasions, when one of my kids made a new friend, their parents would hastily decide that it was time to go home.
We all have stupid questions that need answering. Fortunately, living in the 21st Century have provided us a means to get those answers via curious internet columnists.
Depending on your disability, it's still perfectly legal in America to screw you over in a fabulous myriad of ways.
Most girls can remember the very first time they let their inner b**** out. It's like suddenly discovering you have mutant powers that are both terrifying and awesome.
Some marketing ploys have become so ingrained in our culture, we simply accept them as fact.
The F-word is a blaring small-talk siren that forces seemingly reasonable people to forget whatever they were just doing and start reciting the 'Basic Wedding' questionnaire.
We know what you're thinking and yes, he has been hit in the face with a pool cue.
The next time you're having a bad day, remember that you could be clocking in to a day's worth of web gore and child pornography.
Even our most solemn and serious places can have some really strange Easter eggs in them.
When traveling in Germany, refuse the temptation to open any windows.
There are real folks out there who, when danger came a-knocking, mustered the mental steel to uppercut danger in its stupid idiot face.
What's actually fake news is thinking Donald Trump coined the idea of 'fake news.'