Drugs: the pastime of popes everywhere. While some teetotaling squares might take a “just say no” approach, we here at Cracked are research-driven. This commitment to research is why we've published pieces by legal drug testers, why we're explored the “legalize drugs” approach (especially given how racist the war on drugs is), and definitely not why we know what we know about McDonald's coffee stirrers.
One great thing about dru—uh, we mean, one great thing about research is that it usually leads to interesting facts. Like the Finnish soldier who did a platoon's worth of speed during WWII. Or how Louisa May Alcott, author of Little Women, could opium Keith Richards under a table. Interesting facts! Now if you'll excuse us, we need to go do more research, have a ski gunfight, and write a bestseller.