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September 25, 2024

The first film Ben Affleck directed was, ah… not great.

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40

Grrrl Power!

CRACKED.COM Edgy Movies Then vs. Now Grrrl power Female representation have come a long way to get to Promising Young Woman. 1933's Baby Face had a prudish, post-Code cut - but also one where the protagonist is advised to use her sexuality to get men to take her where she wants to be. It ain't the kitchen. — Source: blameitonjorge/YouTube

39

Towelie

South Park Then vs. Now FARM TEGRIDY FARM GR TOWELIE Still mighty high. CRACKED.COM

38

Ben Affleck

Directors and their beginnings Then vs. Now Ben Affleck Affleck has earned directorial respect with Gone Baby Gone and Argo. But he began with a few shorts, particularly 1993's currently-disowned I Killed My Lesbian Wife, Hung Her on a Meat Hook, and Now I Have a Three-Picture Deal at Disney. It's the stereotype of art-school douche-bro filmmaking. درود بر حمييى بت شكن CRACKED.COM — CBR

37

The Statue of Liberty

Disaster movies Then vs. Now Lady Liberty A somewhat iconic shot from 2004's The Day After Tomorrow is a direct callback to 1933's Deluge, pretty much the first disaster movie ever. CRACKED.COM

36

Budget

Die Hard Then vs. Now Die Hard ($30 million) Die Hard 2 ($70 million) Die Hard With a Vengeance ($90 million) Live Free or Die Hard ($110 million) A Good Day to Die Hard ($92 million) The budgets Budgets kept escalating with each sequel- until A Good Day to Die Hard came along. Still, that one wasn't low enough for us to make fun of it, so that movie can't even do that right. CRACKED.COM — Source: Wikipedia

35

Fallen Celebrities Then vs. Now LENA DUNHAM was an up-and-coming Wunderkind of feminist indie media. AFTER A STRING OF CONTROVERSIES AND TONE-DEAF POSITIONS, her name became synonym with liberal hypocrisy and privileged white feminism. By the time she agreed to adapt a book about a Syrian refugee, she had become a parody of herself. CRACKED.COM — Source

34

Violence Against Eyes

CRACKED.COM Edgy Movies Then vs. Now Eye violence One of the most brutal scenes in Eli Roth's Hostel features eye-gouging. Gross. Eye violence, however, has been a classic of edgy cinema since Luis Buñuel's 1929 short film An Andalusian Dog showed an eye being slashed (something pulled off by using a cow's eye). — Source: blameitonjorge/YouTube

33

Punchline to Appreciated Then vs. Now Marilyn Monroe Marilyn became the poster girl for the dumb blonde, but after decades of revaluation her smarts and her amazing talent are slowly replacing the shallow image. CRACKED.COM — Source

32

Fallen Celebrities Then vs. Now CHARLIE ROSE hosted his eponymous talk show from 1991 to 2017. НЕ WAS FIRED FROM PBS AND CBS due to allegations of sexual harassment dating from 1991 to 2011. Не tried a comeback in 2022 by interviewing a billionaire. Sheesh, holding water to climate-collapsing obscene wealth sure is a great look, Charlie. CRACKED.COM — Source

31

Fallen Celebrities Then vs. Now RANDY QUAID is an Oscar- nominated actor. НЕ THEN WENT FULL MAGA, and started supporting networks too extreme RIN even for Fox News. And this without even mentioning his star whacker conspiracy theory about movie star assassins he claims killed Heath Ledger. CRACKED.COM — Source

30

Punchline to Appreciated Then vs. Now Robert Pattinson Today, all the sulking, glistening and silly, silly hair of Edward Cullen in Twilight have become a footnote in Pattinson's career (okay, a big footnote, but still), and he has proven his insane talent in movies like High Life, The Lighthouse, and The King. CRACKED.COM — Source

29

William Friedkin

Directors and their beginnings Then vs. Now Sonny Chér Good Times William Friedkin Before The Exorcist and The French Connection, Friedkin began doing documentaries. His first feature film, however, was the sketch comedy Good Times, with Sonny and Cher. Friedkin was embarrassed by it, and went on to direct a bunch of artsy films, like, to exorcize the movie off him. CRACKED.COM — Flavorwire, Wikipedia

28

Movies altered after the release Then vs. Now Cats Like a video game patch, Cats had to be altered right after release because the CGI was awful. Still, we know not to blame the FX artists. It was all director Tom Hooper and the studio's last-minute demands, leading to the harrowing visions of human hands, floating heads, buttholes, and, well, the film Cats. CRACKED.COM — Source

27

Movies

Halloween Then vs. Now From the first to the last The first film is, drum roll please, 1978's Halloween. We have nothing to add to almost five decades of discourse about this movie, it just rocks, watch it. 2022's Halloween Ends is meant to finish the saga, putting an end to Laurie Strode's five terrifying encounters with the Shape. CRACKED.COM — Wikipedia

26

Randy Marsh

South Park Then vs. Now RANDY MARSH South Park's local geologist is now South Park's local marijuana farmer. - - TEGRIDY FARMS CRACKED.COM

25

Tone

Indiana Jones Then vs. Now From old-school adventuring to a sci-fi B-movie The tone of the Indiana Jones movies has been quite consistent (ок, except for Crystal Skull's goofier sci-fi comedy moments). Raiders was old-school adventuring with a modern twist. Temple was straight- up horror, with a Die Hard-like final hour of action. And The Last Crusade returned to the Raiders template, but with a lighter tone, CRACKED COM — Wikipedia

24

Influence

Hellraiser Then vs. Now Influence Hellraiser's imagery and influence are everywhere. Pinhead has showed up in several episodes of The Simpsons, and a Rick and Morty episode is about Cenobite-ish pleasure creatures. Similarly, a Cenobite-like villain appears in Cabin in the Woods, and Hellraiser even has as its best unofficial sequel the cult cosmic horror film The Void. CRACKED.COM — Tv References, Adult Swim UK, , Cabin in the Woods scene (via YouTube), The Horror Geek/YouTube

23

Chris Brown

Fallen Celebrities Then vs. Now R CHRIS BROWN had a very successful R&B career. HE'S ALSO A NOTORIOUS COLLECTOR OF ABUSE ALLEGATIONS. In the years after the Rihanna fiasco, accusations of violence just keep popping up. CRACKED.COM — Source: NBC News

22

Punchline to Appreciated Then vs. Now P O Tom Cruise Cruise's talent was never really questioned, but his public persona turned him into a joke for a long time. Today, he seems to have chilled out (we hope), and so we're just left enjoying his legendary talent and insane commitment to mind-blowing action. CRACKED.COM — Source

21

DuckTales

TV Reboots and Revivals Then vs. Now 1987-1990 DuckTales The new team had big shoes to fill-and fill them they did. The revival continues to have wacky adventuring, while also having much more depth than the original. The intro has nothing on the original, though, but at least they kept the iconic theme song. 2017-2021 CRACKED.COM — Paste Magazine

20

Spock

Star Trek Then vs. Now Caught between logic and emotion Leonard Nimoy played Spock from 1965 to 2013 as a half-Vulcan, half-human individual caught between his two heritages. In 1979's The Motion Picture, he has expunged himself of all emotion, and remained like this from then on. Zachary Quinto plays him all pouty, and Ethan Peck currently tries to convey his neurodivergent nature. CRACKED.COM — Polygon, Game Rant

19

Fallen Celebrities Then vs. Now R. KELLY was an R&B superstar with a string of worldwide hits. ABUSE ALLEGATIONS AGAINST HIM, THOUGH, GO BACK TO THE '90s. In 2022 he was sentenced to 30 years in jail for running a literal sex ring -which means crimes we won't even mention. CRACKED.COM — Source

18

Kenny McCormick

South Park Then VS. Now KENNY McCORMICK He's alive. For now... TRASH CRACKED.COM

17

Hellraiser

Horror Classics Then vs. Now Hellraiser What started as two classic movies devolved into nine further sequels of descending quality. Still, 2000's Inferno was a half-decent straight-to-video sequel... and that's pretty much it, until the 2022 remake by David Bruckner comes out. CRACKED.COM

16

Sex

Edgy Movies Then vs. Now The first sex scene By now, we really don't see how the cinematic depiction of sex can be made transgressive anymore. Back in the day, though, the 1933 Czech film Ecstasy broke new ground by showing the very first non-pornographic sex scene in the history of cinema, female orgasm and all. CRACKED.COM — Source: Marie Claire

15

TV Reboots and Revivals Then vs. Now 1977 Roots Roots was a powerful, respectful miniseries that helped millions understand the history of slavery in the U.S. (and won a bunch of awards). The remake was very well received, had an impressive cast, and made some needed changes for historical accuracy's sake. 2016 CRACKED.COM — Source

14

First Movie Dinosaurs

Dinosaurs in movies Then vs. Now The very first dinosaurs on film Everyone says the first big screen dinosaur was 1914's cartoon Gertie The Dinosaur-but then there's also the 1914 caveman short film Brute Force, which had a T. rex in the background, and years before in 1905, the very first actual dinosaur appearance, in the short Prehistoric Peeps. CRACKED.COM — Wikipedia, Prehistoric Peeps (via YouTube)

13

Josie and the Pussycats

Live-Action Adaptations of Cartoons Then vs. Now Josie and the Pussycats A breezy, fun Hanna-Barbera cartoon from the '70s that was moderately successful, but still lived under the Scooby shadow. More recently, the characters appeared in the Riverdale TV show, but their true cult status came with the underrated and actually kinda badass 2001 live-action movie. CRACKED.COM — Was This Movie Secretly Cursed? (PODCAST)

12

Charlize Theron

Punchline to Appreciated Then vs. Now Charlize Theron After Monster showcased Theron's immense acting talent (and even gave her a Best Actress Oscar), she could do whatever she wanted, and nobody would ever consider her just a pretty face anymore. CRACKED.COM

11

LGBT

CRACKED.COM Edgy Movies Then vs. Now LGBT representation Before the prudish Hays Code ruined the fun, 1932's Call Her Savage featured gay folks, and even a gay bar. By now, a long history of queer representation has led to classics like Moonlight, Call Me By Your Name, and - and did we already mention Moonlight? — Source: Wikipedia

10

Star Wars

Star Wars Then vs. Now The reluctant mentor While Obi-Wan was more than willing to train a young Luke, Luke ends up becoming the opposite of his mentor and refuses to train Rey. Mark Hamill himself had doubts about Luke's dark turn, but eventually came around. CRACKED.COM — Sources: Vanity Fair/YouTube, Mark Hamill/Twitter

9

Full House

TV Reboots and Revivals Then vs. Now 1987-1995 Full House The original show was kind of bland, but generally beloved for its sweetness and earnestness. The revival continued the blandness, only now trying raunchy humor, and no, it didn't work. Well, at least Bob Saget was cool. Fuller House 2016-2020 CRACKED.COM — IndieWire

8

Train to Busan

Horror Classics Then vs. Now MUNICIPAL LAST TRAIN TO MEW YORK Train to Busan This awesome 2016 South-Korean zombie movie had a little-known animated prequel, and then an actual sequel which did not get the amazing reviews of the original. And then there's the American remake, The Last Train to New York, coming in 2023. Our bet? That it'll suck, of course. CRACKED.COM

7

Punchline to Appreciated Then vs. Now Jonah Hill Hill was hilarious in Superbad and such movies, but he had higher goals than being a clown. Moneyball and The Wolf of Wall Street transformed his career, and while he still does comedies, he got even more respect with his directorial debut, Mid90s. - CRACKED.COM — Source

6

Fallen Celebrities Then vs. Now JEFFREY JONES acted in a bunch of awesome movies НЕ WAS ALSO ARRESTED FOR POSSESSION OF, ERM, CHEESE PIZZA, and had to register as a sex offender. Не has since resumed acting, mainly on the stage and stuff like 2019's Deadwood: The Movie. CRACKED.COM — Source

5

The Cenobites

Hellraiser Then vs. Now Cenobites: from otherworldly entities to moralistic prudes In the first two films, the Cenobites are articulate and rational extradimensional beings who have transcended humanity and remain frozen in ecstatic torture. Breaking with Barker's original concept, however, the sequels take a weird moralistic turn, with Pinhead and the gang judging sinners. It's all very preachy, trite, and just lame. CRACKED.COM — Marvelous Videos/YouTube, In Praise of Shadows/YouTube, Film Comics Explained/YouTube

4

Leonardo DiCaprio

Punchline to Appreciated Then vs. Now Leonardo DiCaprio DiCaprio was already showing insane talent in his early movies, but he developed a heartthrob image that many enjoyed dissing. Soon enough, though, Leo outgrew it and his talent became undoubtable. CRACKED.COM

3

Titanic

Disaster movies Then vs. Now Titanic There have been around ten movies about the sinking, with the first one, Saved from the Titanic, premiering 31 days after the tragedy. Classy! After 1997's Titanic, however, we really don't see how another good disaster epic could ever be made. CRACKED.COM

2

Madness

Edgy Movies Then vs. Now Absolute madness 2018's Climax had half its cast going insane from a really bad trip, but the 1926 Japanese experimental film A Page of Madness had no problem putting deeply psychologically disturbed characters in center stage. CRACKED.COM — More: 9 Terrifying Old Movies That Put Modern Horror To Shame

1

Fallen Celebrities Then vs. Now MATT LAUER was the face of NBC's Today for 20 years. НЕ ALSO REPORTEDLY HARASSED A LOT OF WOMEN, abused his power, and had a button to close the door of his office automatically, as normal people do. Не was fired from NBC, and nobody has seen him since. CRACKED.COM — Source

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