Cracked Archive - News

13 Things You Didn't Know You Should Know

The world is like a movie written by a dozen coked-up screenwriters, the script of which was then eaten by one of their dogs, forcing the actors to try to perform their parts by reading the shit.

830

5 Reasons Police Have Probably Started The Next Civil War

Police sure are crazy in Baltimore, huh? Trick question! Police are crazy pretty much everywhere.

0

6 People So Good At Sex They're Basically Magic

The best sex is always about timing.

0

The 14 Most Important Stories You Probably Missed

We have taken it upon ourselves to quickly summarize the most important and/or ridiculous news stories from the last week (or so).

290

6 Reasons Why The Cops Keep Killing People (Besides Racism)

When will cops freaking stop killing people?

2499

7 World's Fairs That Became Utter Nightmares

As it turns out, when you attempt to maintain relevancy in the world, a lot of things can fail.

0

The 13 Biggest Stories Of The Week (You May Have Missed)

Following the news is like trying to listen to a confusing tale told by a madman who insists on talking with his butt cheeks like Ace Ventura.

463

6 BS Medical Stories Your Friends Shared On Facebook

Some recent medical news stories are about as accurate as the 'Plastic Surgeons Hate Her!' spam ads decorating those same articles.

0

The 5 Worst Things Famous Companies Made To Train Employees

It's pretty clear that somewhere along the way, a few of the corporate training video producers of the world completely and totally lost their minds.

0

The 13 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (4/21)

The world is dark and full of terrors, and no reasonable person can be expected to keep up with every important news story while maintaining their sanity.

407

5 Baffling Dick Moves That Won Actual Lawsuits

The legal system is messed up, man.

1139

6 Totally Confusing Crime Sprees That Are Baffling Police

We've assembled a gallery of the strangest rogues you might one day find in Arkham's minimum security wing.

506

5 Things I've Learned From Admitting I'm A Hipster

I know that I'm basically a cliche, and rather than being bothered by it, I find great pleasure in hyperconformity.

0

7 Signs of Old Age That Hit Most People When They're Young

What can you expect to start fading away before people stop seeing you as a useless twentysomething?

0

6 Headlines That Prove The Media Doesn't Understand Politics

Here are the first of what will probably be thousands of B.S. political news stories the media refused to get right.

945