Cracked Archive - News

Those 'Chinese Mystery Seeds' Are Probably Normal Seeds (But Maybe Still Worry)
They could still be a problem, just not for the reason you might think.
- Authors
- By Amanda Mannen
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10
12 Boss Movie & General 'Now You Know' Facts
A little 'huh' to break up your day.
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- By AM Smiley, Chris Pauls
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36
The Lincoln Project Isn't Fooling Anyone
The Lincoln Project is the political equivalent of the Vice Principal flipping his chair at an assembly and trying to rap.
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- By Dan Duddy
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71
What Is Up With Trump's New Postmaster General?
Trump's new guy seems to hate the postal service as much as he does.
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- By Dan Duddy
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27
We Don’t Have To Talk About Every Earthquake
Guys, your bed shook a little. Chill.
- Authors
- By Dan Duddy
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36
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So, How Are Terrorists Holding Up During This?
Evil in the time of corona.
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- By Cedric Voets
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37
35 Days Later, Officers Figure Out The Starbucks Thing Wasn't A Tampon
The Starbucks tampon mystery has been solved.
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- By Dan Duddy
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51
Are Billionaire Donations Really Worth Celebrating?
No one should be in a position to cavalierly give away 30 billion dollars because nobody should have 30 billion dollars.
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- By Dan Duddy
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61
5 Ways Crime Is Getting Weird During This
Everyone's had to make changes right now. Even law breakers.
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- By Andrea Meno
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20
'Umbrella Guy' Smashing Windows At George Floyd Protest Is Allegedly A White Supremacist
There are people who pretend to be a part of BLM, but are actually white supremacists. Unfortunately, not all of them can be identified by their umbrellas.
- Authors
- By Dan Duddy
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90
Uh, Maybe Don't Listen To The Demon Sperm Lady
Before conservative Americans start declaring themselves Immanuelsexuals, they might wanna look into what else she believes.
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- By Amanda Mannen
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81
Enough With Empty Social Media Challenges Already
We've fallen far from the halcyon days of the Ice Bucket Challenge.
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- By Dan Duddy
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30
5 Extremely Random Groups Helping Out In All This
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- By Andrea Meno
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70
12 Fascinating 'Now You Know' Facts
Movie and general facts to stick in your noggin.
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- By AM Smiley, Chris Pauls
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44
Hey, Let's Ditch Black Friday This Year
It's about time Walmart and Target employees got off on Thanksgiving, but that's not nearly enough.
- Authors
- By Dan Duddy
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36