Cracked Archive - News

Industries Left In Shambles By All This
Not every one is getting a bail out.
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- By Kelly Stone
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89
Bill De Blasio Is The Dumbest Man In NYC
When it comes to dealing with the coronavirus Bill de Blasio has been a one-man three stooges routine.
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- By Dan Duddy
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90
Sorry, NYC Typhoid Morons, Go Drink At Home
Let's plague this joint.
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- By Cedric Voets
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12
Working For McDonalds Is Going To Get Even More Annoying But It's For The Best
McDonalds is going to start implementing routine temperature checks, which sucks, but also that's life right now.
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- By Dan Duddy
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20
Stealing A Van Gogh Is Easy Now, Apparently
The painting as been released from quarantine.
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- By Luis Prada
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13
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The Science Behind The Fear Our Brains Create For Us
Your brain is kind of a dick, but it means well.
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- By Kelly Stone
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22
Politicians Whose Pop Culture Ignorance Is Real (And Hilariously) Clear
Next time, just ask an intern to explain it to you.
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- By Alex Hanton
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137
Italian Mayors Have Leveled Up Their Response To Scofflaws
You are unprepared for the sheer volume of Italian pursed fingers hand gestures in this article.
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- By Luis Prada
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32
Weird Things That Are Gonna Be Mainstream Under COVID-19
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- By Lydia Bugg
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73
Coronavirus Q&A: Stay The Hell Inside
Be a real hero by sitting inside. It's literally the least you can do.
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- By Luis Prada
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49
Unpleasant Realizations About Society During Coronavirus
Other than us needing a LOT more sweatpants.
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- By Archie Grimm
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126
Goddamn It, Trump
Ladies and Gentlemen, the President of the United States.
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- By Cedric Voets
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218
5 Deeply Cursed Attempts To Cash In On Coronavirus on Amazon
What a truly stupid historical epoch we're in.
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- By Mark Hill
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48
Small Airplanes Could Help With Some Remaining Coronavirus Problems
Travel should absolutely be limited at this point in time, but there's a bunch of ways little airplanes can help.
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- By Isaac Cabe
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13
Coronavirus Porn Is Here
The power of the human boner cannot be suppressed.
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- By Amanda Mannen
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