Cracked Archive - News
Like Edward, 'Twilight' Never Dies (But It Shows Up In Times Like Ours)
Hang tight, spider monkey -- 'Twilight' mania is back -- and here to stay.
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- By Carly Tennes
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5 Anti-Abortion Site Being Trolled— Er, Ogred By Shrek Fans
The heroes we need *and* deserve.
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- By Carly Tennes
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OnlyFans Reverses Controversial Decision To Ban 'Explicit' Content
Presumably losing most of your patrons/income is never a great business move.
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- By Carly Tennes
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Nirvana Sued By The Baby From Cover of 'Nevermind'
Move over, Teen Spirit -- it smells like a 'Nevermind' lawsuit
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- By Carly Tennes
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5 News Moments From A Few Decades Ago That Seem Surreal Now
Sadly, we didn't have Twitter back then to blow these up.
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- By Ivan Farkas
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WaPo Columnist Says Indian Food Is Made With One Spice, Gets Roasted By The Entire Internet
"ummm, what?" - anyone with tastebuds reading the OpEd, probably.
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- By Carly Tennes
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Soon-To-Be-Ex NY Lawmaker Andrew Cuomo, Reportedly Left His Dog Behind After Leaving Governor's Mansion
Big Ted Cruz Energy.
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- By Carly Tennes
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How To Understand Billionaires (In Four Easy Steps)
Billionaires don’t pay their fair share in taxes, even though doing so wouldn’t impact them literally at all.
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- By William Kuechenberg
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Boat That Blocked The Suez, Disrupted Global Trade, Gets Second Chance
If at first, you don't succeed in navigating a boat through the Suez canal, causing a several-day aquatic traffic backup and arguably an international incident, try, try again
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- By Carly Tennes
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Inside Walt Disney World's Most Infamous EPCOT Heist
Here's what an abandoned thrill ride, an NBA star, and $7,000 of stolen Haunted Mansion costumes all have to do with the disappearance of one of EPCOT's most iconic figures.
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- By Carly Tennes
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Emily Blunt To Star In New Amazon Movie About History of Union-Busting Pinkerton Detective Agency
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- By Carly Tennes
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Shrek and Ned Flanders From 'The Simpsons' Are Streetwear's Latest Muses
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- By Carly Tennes
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OnlyFans Tries to Pretend It's Not OnlyFans To Appease App Store Overlords
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- By Carly Tennes
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A California Politician Resigned After Bragging About Two Affairs Into A Mic
Sometimes, the scandal timeline speeds up. Such as when, say, the guy unwittingly admits everything from the start.
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- By Ryan Menezes
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Hermit Crabs Get Wound Up For The Nasty By ... Ocean Pollution?
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- By Carly Tennes
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