Games like Elden Ring made video game bosses a thing to fear once again, so we're guessing our readers could do with a list of video game bosses so hilariously easy that they’ll make anyone feel like a real-life Witcher.

Tomb Raider The Angel Of Darkness allows you to defeat the main antagonist by resting

Remember "The End" from Metal Gear Solid 3, the boss we can kill by making the time pass in the console options? This is like that but in real-time.

At the time of its release, critics and players alike ravaged Tomb Raider: The Angel of Darkness for making Lara Croft nearly unplayable – and they were right. Still, reviewers should have mentioned how developers kind of made up for it by making some enemies equally inept at everything. Better yet is how two of these enemies are the second-to-last and the very last boss in the game. Get ready for a highly climactic battle!

The pre-final boss, an alchemist named Eckhardt, has just achieved the very original power of shooting killer neon lights from his hands. It's genuinely challenging to make use of the game's terrible controls to dodge his attacks, but there’s a much easier and way more counter-intuitive way to go about it: lying down and waiting for him to get tired.

Lara avoiding projectiles by doing nothing

Embracer

The battle has more phases, but this works for all of them and we don't think our readers would want to see more of Lara Croft just lying down.

Though powerful, Eckhardt never prepared for someone who’d be so unimpressed at his newfound abilities that she'd just lie down while he tried to kill her, so he is completely unable to take aim at the very still Lara Croft. The hardest part for players is enduring the secondhand embarrassment of watching the boss miss all of his attacks until he has to reload his mana or whatever. We can shoot him when he's out or we can just walk up to him and punch him once.

Lara stabbing the boss with a magic macfuggin

Embracer

Maybe this is an allegory to how tired everyone involved in this series was at this point.

The final boss in the game comes right after, and though also completely useless, he at least requires players to be able to climb a ladder and press the “kill boss and roll credits” button.

The final boss from Blair Witch



Remember the Blair Witch game from 2019? Neither do we, so this isn't about that. Even though most are blissfully unaware, the Blair Witch Project had not one but three tie-in video games, and they were actually pretty good – at least if we ignore the first game's main boss. Surprisingly, it's not the titular witch, but a regular pastor. Yeah, unlike the witch, he doesn't have the power to, uh, make vague weird songs at night. This is but a regular child-kidnapping pastor – something that's way scarier because it's real. The confrontation is no regular boss fight, however, as it's more of a race. Even though he supposedly doesn't have special powers, he's pretty fast for a guy who has to drag a girl around.
the pastor running away with a child

Terminal Reality

In hindsight, the girl's running animation makes her by far the scariest thing about this game.

The old tank-style controls are the biggest enemy here, but luckily they also affect every other character in the game. The pastor will end up getting stuck in a door and we can finish him off in one slapstick hit.

ending the child's nightmare via shovel

Terminal Reality

Even more surprising and riveting than the movie's ending.

 

The tiger from Crash Bandicoot is allergic to cheese

It's totally fine to admit we had a hard time beating many of the bosses in the Crash Bandicoot series when we were kids. Not so easy is playing the Crash Bandicoot remasters and accepting that the games remain hard as hell even to our stronger bodies and wiser brains.

Tiny Tiger is the very first boss we have to defeat in Crash Bandicoot 3, and despite far from the hardest boss we'll find in that game, he's still the first considerable challenge many will face. We're probably 20 years late in saying this, but players can avoid every single obstacle in that fight by simply staying in the upper left corner of the arena.

The people responsible for the more recent remasters were well aware of this issue when making the game, so how did they fix it? Well, by completely ignoring the problem and instead having the people in the arena throw cheese at the player for not playing fair.

the audience is not entertained by crash's cheesiness

Sony, Activision

The joke is on them for a true gamer knows no shame.

Mgsv water gun vs man on fire

If there's one thing that Metal Gear Solid V does very well, that's establishing the “Man On Fire” as someone you don't mess with. Good luck engaging him on a hand-to-hand brawl since he's just manly lava and you better not try bullets on him because he naturally converts all projectiles into his own ammunition.

the man on fire shoots back all bullets

Konami

Still, he's not completely unbeatable due to an inexplicable water allergy. One of the ways to defeat him is by luring him below a water tank and then dropping it on his ass, but that's a lot of work and also pretty mean towards water tanks. So what can we do, then? It's not as if we can use a super soaker to beat him – is what anyone who doesn't know how wacky Metal Gear Solid gets would say. It turns out that instead of having the work, we can just relay that to our research team and have them wisely spend their time in the development of a water pistol. That's supposedly both just a gag weapon and one of many fun ways to abuse our soldiers, but it works wonders against this boss.

The toughest enemies in Skyrim can't stand your shouting

When we think about Skyrim and scary bosses we naturally think of the dragons, but those conveniently land near us so that we can kill them. How is that anything other than very kind and nice? A scarier enemy would be Vyrthur, a very old snow elf from the Dawngard DLC.

Vyrthur is ugly

Bethesda

Do you even need some plot-related reason to want to kill this guy?

Despite all of his might, Vyrthur chooses the worst possible place to fight the main character, somewhere he can very easily fall from.

Maybe consider an indoor location to fight a guy who was born with the ability to shout-push everyone into oblivion.

Top Image: Konami

Get the Cracked Daily Newsletter!

We've got your morning reading covered.

Forgot Password?