At Cracked, we are excitedly anticipating the DVD release of Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay. How excited, you ask? Way the hell more excited than we were when Fido came out a while back and we brought you Fido Presents: Cracked's Top 7 Halloween Articles, which is to say, "very."
Why so jazzed, you ask? Well, this laugh out loud comedy brings back the hilarious Neil Patrick Harris and our favorite stoner friends. Don't take our word for it (which, by the way, is in no way tainted by the ads you may see around you on this page). Just ask Variety, which says "In its own wacky way, Harold & Kumar Escape From Guantanamo Bay is one of the ballsiest comedies to come out of Hollywood in a long time." See? Variety likes it, and they're not even getting paid billions of dollars in ad money to say so. Not that the sweet, sweet money is impacting us, or anything...
In honor of Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay's DVD release we bring you 10 of our best articles about drugs, crime, prison, and President Bush. Basically anything that shows a blatant disregard for the law.
We called this after the first movie, Neil Patrick Harris deserves his own spin off. Come on, Doogie Howser high and riding a unicorn to Sonic? We're seeing Oscar, if stoners were allowed into the Academy, and actually had the motivation to vote.
Can't get your hands on some conventional drugs? Most people know someone who claims they had an awesome time on a teaspoon of nutmeg. But you might want to read this article, and view the terrifying images before taking them at their word.
Don't underestimate the POTUS. He may have gotten us into war and slowed up the ol' economy a smidge, but he is nowhere near as dumb as he looks, acts and sounds. Also, according to Harold and Kumar, he smokes pot and hates his parents. Just like you!
Shouldn't military operation names be serious and inspire confidence in our troop? Operation Block Party makes us want to crack open a beer and sit in a lawn chair for five hours, maybe even take in a movie. Harold and Kumar Escape From Guantanamo Bay sounds good...
This is your brain on drugs (fried egg). This is your brain after watching TV for eight hours and seeing these commercials 700 times (fried egg). Noticing a pattern? Cracked.com vows to keep kids off stupid commercials.
Need to make money fast? Hey, we're not asking questions here. Everyone's had to sell off a little piece of their soul ("a little piece of their soul" being street slang for anti-depressants you found under the bathroom sink) to get home from Vegas. Well, here are five ways to scam your fellow man that don't involve making your mom a risk to herself.
You don't make astonishing amounts of money without ending up a jerk in some way.
Being at the top of your game can really drag you down.
Sometimes our big, dumb brains are just flat-out wrong.