What if we still had ancient gods in modern times? Would Hercules really be the pants-dropping heartthrob he is in the Disney movie? Would Kokopelli enjoy hackeysack? A curious mortal populace demands answers. 

Yes, we're fascinated by mythology here at Cracked, particularly when it comes to ancient gods' weird genitals or sex temples in India. Myths say important things about where we've been culturally, telling us stories that can resonate or instruct even in a world of smartphones. And shedding light on realities behind myths is equally interesting, like the dark truth behind Changeling myths. Read on for more, and seriously: be ready for gods having weird sex. 

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The 5 Most Depraved Sex Scenes from Important Cultural Myths

If you've spent time studying history at all, you probably already know that depraved sex acts are to religion as rock star groupies from the '70s are to depraved sex acts. In other words, they go hand in hand. Or hand in some other body part, depending on who we're talking about.

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