Cracked Archive - Weird World

The 6 Most Disastrous Attempts at Internet Damage Control

They call it the Streisand Effect, and it happens any time people try to suppress Internet criticism, then see it blow up hilariously in their faces.

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18 Things I Regret Doing As Your Mall Elf: An Apology

I am sorry about December 9th, when I used my power as Line Elf to manipulate the length of the line. I'd like to say I intended to make Santa look more popular than he was by keeping the line long, but really I think I was just trying to get single women to flirt their way to the head of the line.

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6 Ways Cities Are Getting Into the Attention-Whore Game

Sad attention grabs are something you expect from reality show characters or self-important activists, people who don't really have any dignity to lose. Surely our civic institutions are above all that. Right?

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6 Crackpot Conspiracy Theories (That Actually Happened)

in the course of looking down our noses at the nutjobs who spread urban legends and conspiracy theories, we have to sometimes stop and point out that there are downright terrifying historical precedents for even their craziest of claims.

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The 6 Most Pointless Supervillain Schemes Ever Hatched

Most supervillain schemes are pretty stupid, when you think about it: Lex Luthor wanted to get rich with a ridiculous real state scam in the first Superman movie, and that's considered a classic. Again: a real estate scam. YOU HAVE MISSILES, DUDE!

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The 5 Ballsiest Acts of Undercover Journalism Ever

As brave as undercover cops have to be to rub elbows with mob bosses and murderers, we submit that there is one group with even bigger balls: undercover journalists. So let's pause to salute these folks.

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The Worst Toy of the 80s, Explained! [Man Comics]

A special edition of Man Comics, brought to you by the worst action figures ever conceived.

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How to Play 'Who Would Win?' [COMIC]

It's a game as old and retarded as time ...

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How to Answer the Question 'What's Bothering You?' [COMIC]

Ways that don't end in your arrest.

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6 Real People With Secret Identities Nobody Saw Coming

Exactly how unfeasible is Dexter or Bruce Wayne's double life? Well, not totally far off the map, apparently.

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6 Resolutions for Those With Realistic Expectations

Unlike a lot of you, I'm not going to partake in any new year's resolutions, the traditional way to improve one's life at the start of a calendar year. Resolutions are easy to make, hard to keep, and each abandoned resolution forms the bass kick in the failure drumbeat of your life.

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5 Weight Loss Tips for Cynical Bastards

I suspect that around 50 percent of the population thinks they're in the smartest, cleverest 3 percent of the species, and they're totally going to be the ones to beat the system.

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5 Things You Use Every Day That Are Getting Awesome Upgrades

These are all either experimental or still too expensive, but they give us a glimpse of how some of the little things in life could be a hell of a lot better in the near future.

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How to Help Pick a Baby Name [COMIC]

The only thing worse than an ironic T-Shirt is an ironic baby name.

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