Rotting deep in the back of the refrigerator of common word usage are even more suspicious-looking Tupperwares full of mixed-up words. Here's a few choice delicacies.
Every once in a while, I have to explain a situation in a full sentence, because one word to represent that situation doesn't exist. And I hate doing that, because I am a whirling, spinning, terrifying, motherfucking HURRICANE of efficiency.
The best thing about being a wild animal, aside from being able to shit wherever you want, is that crimes that would get a human put away for decades are written off with a comical headline.
Experienced travelers all agree that one of the hardest and least rewarding of these cultural obstacles is the experience of arriving in a new town and discovering that everyone there is going to try and murder you.
From those bullshit seatbelt laws to Big Kindergarten trying to tell you which preschools you can and can't take your gun into, it seems like today's nanny nation is intent on making our lives as safe as possible at the expense of any and all excitement. That's not how it used to be, though.
Considering that booze is one of the pillars of human civilization, it's kind of shocking how little we know about it.
Everybody enjoys the guilty pleasure of going on a self-righteous rant every once in a while like an Aaron Sorkin character or something, whether it's about the way politics and the media are these days, or more everyday things like people with more than 15 items in the express lane.
Al ot of times the only thing between mediocrity and market dominance is the kind of devious plan that would make a supervillain proud.