A simple ingredients label might be the most horrifying thing you read all year.
This week we saw revenge, deceit, imbalance, sociopathy - and the everlasting, heartwarming goodness of a WWE legend.
Here's what to look out for so you don't get swallowed by the angry, gaping maw of predatory advertising cleverly disguised as articles.
If we're going to keep getting arrested for letting the kids play outside, at least give us a few cool Kit-Kat flavors and tolerable special effects.
What happens when advertisers just say
This week was all about creeping, lurking things: police militarization, tiny women hiding in cupboards, the pits of Hell.
This is the Internet age, where skepticism is rampant. Even the most innocently spontaneous photo is subject to doubt.
Everyone was whipped up about marriage, children and Satan. So let's go ahead and call this "Omen Week."
Superheroes have to have use their powers to do some pretty dickish things at some point.
Last week was all about jerks.
Attention: Willie Nelson is still high.
Only one of these popular bastards was chock full of lies.