Cracked Archive - News

The 14 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (8/4)

Staying on top of current events is like trying to keep an accurate count of the wolves who are currently chasing you through the woods.

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Photoplasty

15 Embarrassing Secrets You Hope Hackers Don't Release

Hacking is all the rage these days -- and everyone's name is on the hit list.

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5 Insane Police Forces That Have Zero Right To Arrest You

It's not easy being a cop. So imagine how frustrating it must be when they run across organized groups of half-cocked, wannabe, do-gooding amateurs like these people.

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5 Ways College Screws Over Poor Kids

There are a whole bunch of really smart, motivated, hard-working people who aren't being given a shot at a real education.

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The 13 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (7/28)

Judging from the news, the cabal of powerful people who secretly run the world have all dropped a shitload of acid recently.

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5 Incredibly Positive Trends No One's Talking About

If you take a moment to stop actively focusing on the negative, it's easy to see that, despite our collective insistence to the contrary, the world as a whole is chugging along towards a better place.

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6 News Stories Everybody Needs To Stop Sharing On Facebook

Stop making the world a worse place.

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I Buy Human Teeth: 4 Realities Of A Weird Black Market

Where do your teeth go after they've been pulled out of your screaming skull by a sadist with a light on his forehead?

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6 Brothels that Turn Sex Into A Day At An Amusement Park

Even though the basic product is still the same (roof, prostitutes, wet-naps, shame), there's apparently still room for some forward-thinking innovation.

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5 Reasons Even Gun Owners Should Hate The NRA

Listen, United States: You really need to stop the board of the NRA.

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The 13 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (7/21)

The world makes about as much sense as the plot of your average late-night Cinemax porno, one watched with the sound off so your Mom doesn't hear.

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5 Drugs That Turn Your World Into A Real-Life Horror Movie

I wouldn't blame you if you have a hard time looking at Pixy Stix again after seeing the effects of these drugs.

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The 12 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (7/14)

Watching the news is a lot like watching the new season of 'True Detective,' only with even more angst and ridiculous mustaches.

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Pictofacts

15 Media Panics That Totally Missed The Point

The news media is a scary powerful entity. And its got great looking teeth, too.

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The 14 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (7/7)

Judging by the news, the world is kind of like Jurassic Park, only if the dinosaurs were in charge of security.

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