Cracked Archive - News

The 6 F**king Stupidest Reasons Why People Don't Vote

While it's everyone's God-given right to not vote, considering what's at stake this year, never has a more wrong-headed act existed.

By David Christopher Bell
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November 06, 2016

Pictofacts

26 Times This Election Hit Rock Bottom And Kept Digging

Pretty much the entire news cycle this election has been garbage, but here's the worst of it.

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By AM Smiley
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November 05, 2016

We Talk To 3 (Fringe) Alternative Presidential Candidates

These men hold no illusions about their chances of winning, but for better or for worse, you have the option of offering them and their beliefs your support.

By Mark Hill
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November 03, 2016

5 Lessons The 2016 Election Teaches Us About Sexual Assault

Trump may have started the conversation, but keep in mind that he doesn't actually own this scum pond. He's just one more turd leeching on a system designed to favor the powerful and grabby.

By David Christopher Bell
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November 02, 2016

The 13 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (11/1)

Look, we get it. At this point in the election cycle, checking the news is just asking for a migraine.

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By Ted E., T. S. Obiech, Scott Laffey
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November 01, 2016

6 Reasons Why A New Civil War Is Possible And Terrifying

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By Robert Evans
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November 01, 2016

All The Dumb Sh!t Trump Has Done As Nominee In One Mega-List

Donald Trump has proven to be the T-1000 of presidential bids.

By Luis Prada
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October 31, 2016

The Cracked Store Staff Picks

By Dan Duddy
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October 27, 2016

The 13 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (10/25)

Look, we get it. You can either get your Hillary Quinn costume done by Halloween or keep up with the news.

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By Ted E., T. S. Obiech, Scott Laffey
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October 25, 2016

A Plea To McDonald's: It’s Time To Kill Ronald McDonald

Listen, McDonald's: No one has liked or even been somewhat amused by clowns in at least 40 years.

By Ian Fortey
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October 22, 2016

What You Should Know About Ken Bone

If you're like us and didn't know who he is or why he's famous, we've put together a simple FAQ to lay out everything you need to know about Ken Bone.

By CRACKED Staff
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October 19, 2016

The 13 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (10/18)

Keeping up with the news is like sweeping up after a parade made entirely out of elephants drinking espresso.

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By Ted E., T. S. Obiech, Scott Laffey
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October 18, 2016

Why It's Now Impossible To Satirize Donald Trump

Trump has sunk to the stinking depths of being unparodiable.

By Ian Fortey
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October 13, 2016

8 Less Known Trump Stories That’d Derail Any Other Campaign

This election cycle has given us plenty, but dig deeper, and there are so, so, so, so many more times when Donald Trump has proven himself to be a festering wart on the genitals of America.

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