Cracked Archive - News
Traffic Is Light, So One Guy Took Advantage To Drive Like A Maniac
Here's a guy who has used social distancing to make a million dollars disappear in the blink of an eye.
- Authors
- By Dan Duddy
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37
37 Pharma Bro Wants A Crack At This (And Out Of Prison)
What is this, some kind of Shkreli Squad?
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- By Cedric Voets
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- 28
Idiots Are Risking It All Right Now For Cigarettes
Tobacco is getting people to do some pretty stupid things right now.
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- By Isaac Cabe
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- 25
The White House Briefings Are Beyond Useless
The White House Press briefings leave more questions unanswered than the Lost finale.
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- By Dan Duddy
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- 61
How Benjamin Netanyahu's 'Evidence' Of Covered-Up Iranian Deaths Became Funny
A short story.
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- By Luis Prada
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- 23
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8 Stupid, Stupid Excuses Given By People Who Got Caught
You can't play the 'I got attacked by a grizzly bear' card that often.
- Authors
- By Chris Scott, Pete Smith, Israel SH, Julia Lange, Peter I. Santiago, Angel Summers, Tee Ngin Rui, Eric Nolff
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- 39
For The Love Of God, Can We Just Legalize Weed Now?
Shouldn't we just legalize weed already?
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- By Dan Duddy
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- 58
Cell Tower Conspiracy Theory Is A Doozy
This might be the new champion of dumb conspiracy theories.
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- By Dan Duddy
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- 39
Industries Left In Shambles By All This
Not every one is getting a bail out.
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- By Kelly Stone
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- 89
Bill De Blasio Is The Dumbest Man In NYC
When it comes to dealing with the coronavirus Bill de Blasio has been a one-man three stooges routine.
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- By Dan Duddy
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- 90
Sorry, NYC Typhoid Morons, Go Drink At Home
Let's plague this joint.
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- By Cedric Voets
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- 12
Working For McDonalds Is Going To Get Even More Annoying But It's For The Best
McDonalds is going to start implementing routine temperature checks, which sucks, but also that's life right now.
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- By Dan Duddy
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Stealing A Van Gogh Is Easy Now, Apparently
The painting as been released from quarantine.
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- By Luis Prada
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- 13
The Science Behind The Fear Our Brains Create For Us
Your brain is kind of a dick, but it means well.
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- By Kelly Stone
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- 22
Politicians Whose Pop Culture Ignorance Is Real (And Hilariously) Clear
Next time, just ask an intern to explain it to you.
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- By Alex Hanton
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- 137
