Cracked Archive - History
5 Phrases No One Would Use If They Knew Where They Came From
Someone, buy Elon Musk a dictionary
- Authors
- By Ryan Menezes
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11 All the Penises in Modern Art Are Too Huge, Says Science
A new study says artists have really been going whole hog the last 50 years
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- By Lauren Vinopal
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- 6
The Pope Who Believed Drinking Breast Milk Would Save His Life
Hey, if the Pope said it’s true, who are we to question him
- Authors
- By Ryan Menezes
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- Comments
- 5
A Russian Defector Thought The U.S. Was So Amazing, It Had To Be Fake
How can Americans live in such luxury? This Walmart is clearly just a movie set.
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- By Ryan Menezes
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- Comments
- 14
5 Great Accomplishments By Lifelong Virgins
Take THAT, mean teens at my local mall!
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- By Eli Yudin
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- 5
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The Phrase ‘Always a Bridesmaid, Never a Bride’ Has Nothing to Do with Weddings and Everything to Do with Bad Breath
It was an advertising tagline — for Listerine.
- Authors
- By Ryan Menezes
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5 Wills of Millionaires That Wreaked Absolute Havoc
Where there's a will, there's a whaaa—?
- Authors
- By Ryan Menezes
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- 4
Pearl Harbor Shipwrecks Are Still Leaking Oil 80 Years Later
The upside: pretty oil rainbows.
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- By Ryan Menezes
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- 8
5 Greek Curses That Show the Gods Needed to Chill
You try to seduce Zeus’ wife ONCE and you’re tortured for eternity
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- By Eli Yudin
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- 9
The Stockholm Syndrome Kidnapper Turned Himself In Years Later, And No One Cared
‘Eh, everyone relevant is dead now, so who cares’
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- By Ryan Menezes
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3 Idiotic Military Blunders That Lost Battles Before They Started
These battles would send Sun Tzu running for a tall glass of baijiu.
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- By Eli Yudin
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- 7
6 Ridiculous Lies You Believe About the Founding of America
It turns out our teachers, Hollywood and whoever we got our Thanksgiving mythology from (Big Turkey?) all made America's origin story far more boring than it actually was for some very disturbing reasons.
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- By Jack O'Brien, Elford Alley
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- 4093
The Guy Who Impersonated A Russian Tsar So Well They Made Him King for Real
Back in the 18th century, plenty of grifters attempted to pass themselves off as royalty, but no one did it quite like Scepan Mali, aka ‘Stephen the Small,’ who somehow convinced the citizens of Montenegro to hand over their country to him
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- By Alex Hanton
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The Intertwined History Of Jews, Christmas, And Chinese Food
Diving into the Jewish tradition of Kung Pao on Christmas.
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- By Eli Yudin
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- 5
5 Other Holiday Foods That Should Be Added To Thanksgiving Dinner
So I'm allowed to eat like a filthy pig, but only one specific kind of bird?
- Authors
- By Eli Yudin
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- 2
