Is Butters the Biggest Player in ‘South Park’?

When it comes to “the game” at South Park Elementary School, a certain fourth grader brought in the highest score by a wide margin — do you know what I am saying?

The concept of “game” has existed in elementary schools and on college campuses for as long as the birds and the bees have been doing their little dance. Who has the most game, who has no game, who’s scoring — these are all common topics of conversation among boys from pre-puberty well into childish adulthood, including those kids who spend 25 timeless years in fourth grade. Despite tackling every topical story and political scuffle of the last quarter century, the boys of South Park continue to be boys, and their attempts to entice the girls of their grade into romantic relationships remains an important part of their reputations.

Over in the South Park subreddit, fans of the show recently discussed how, despite the seeming social hierarchy of the core four kids, Cartman and Kenny consistently find more success in their exploits with women than Stan and Kyle. However, as some users pointed out, the question of who has the most “game” only has one answer, and it might just get someone grounded.

“Butters alone beats all of the school,” one commenter argued during the discussion over which fictional fourth grader has the most game. The case for Butters Stotch being a natural Neil Strauss revolves around the acclaimed South Park Season 13 episode, “Butters’ Bottom Bitch,” in which Butters concocts a play to finally secure his first kiss and end the teasing he receives over his lack of kissing experience. After paying Sally Darson $5 to break the seal, Butters quickly realizes how much money there is to be made in paid “companionship,” thus launching one of the most iconic schemes in South Park history.

Logically, Butters continues down this path of pre-pubescent pimping, taking notes from some industry professionals at a local trade conference and updating his vernacular with fun new phrases. Butters hires some security (Clyde) and builds his business’ legitimacy (through ACORN) while taking real, adult sex workers under his wing before the power of love between another pimp and the undercover Officer Yates inspires Butters to leave “the game” behind.

While Stan, Kyle, Cartman and Kenny may have their crushes (with Kenny even contracting a deadly case of syphilis from one of his), Butters’ booming business proved that he is the only true player on South Park. Game over.