A Indianapolis Cop Declared War On McDonald's Over A Sandwich
Being a police officer is hard work, what with all the paperwork that needs to be completed, the arrests that need to be made, the warrants that need to be signed, the dogs that need to be shot, the "You're a loose cannon" speeches that need to be made, the rookies who need to be hazed, and of course, the people who need to be shot (in the process of shooting a dog).
VGstockstudio/ShutterstockWe didn't make a donut joke. Progress!
So when "DJ," an officer with the Marion County Sheriff's Office in Indianapolis, sat down to enjoy a sandwich which he'd bought earlier that day at McDonald's, he was understandably put off to find that someone had already taken a bite out of it. As a seasoned detective, "DJ" immediately deduced that the perp was definitely a McDonald's employee -- probably a cop-hater affiliated with that "antifa" group he'd heard so much about. He marched back to the store and demanded that the person responsible be found and fired, and back at the station, his captain launched a full-scale investigation.
WTHRWe're sure everyone in town whose stolen car didn't merit a second thought was pleased to know that the police would spare no expense for that 1/16th of a McChicken.
However, it turned out that DJ hadn't been the victim of the Hamburglar ... because he was the Hamburglar. He "took a bite [from] the sandwich upon starting his shift, then placed it in the refrigerator," the sheriff's office said in a statement. "He returned nearly seven hours later, having forgotten that he had previously bitten the sandwich [and] wrongly concluded that a restaurant employee had tampered with his food because he is a law enforcement officer." Ace detective work, DJ. At this rate, you'll make mall security guard in no time.
Colorado Cops Wrecked A House To Arrest A Petty Criminal
On June 3, 2015, Leo Lech watched in horror as police surrounded his home in Greenwood Village. Several hours prior, a local criminal (wanted for crimes) had barricaded himself inside the property, and although the home was empty at the time of this impromptu siege, it was reported that the perp had a gun. Meaning that soon enough, the house's exterior was crawling with heavily armed police and enough firepower to level the entire building. Which, by the end of the siege, they had.
After negotiations with the dangerous master criminal failed, the police resorted to assaulting the building, which involved firing tear gas grenades through the windows, blowing out the walls with explosives, driving an armored truck through the front door, and (probably) kicking over a vase while dragging the guy out. They got their guy, sure, but at what cost? $400,000, to be precise.