Intrigued, Captain Roosevelt Johnson of the Santa Clarita Valley Sheriff's Office actually took this mysterious "chief" up on his offer and wound up in a meeting with three individuals: David Henry, Tonette Hayes, and Brandon Kiel. Seeing as Henry was an Emmy Award-winning TV producer, Hayes a minister, and Kiel an aide to the goddamn state attorney general, maybe the trio initially came off as somewhat legit. But when Captain Johnson saw that two of them were dressed in official-looking police uniforms (that were adorned with patches that bore no resemblance to any recognized agency in the known universe), the red flags started to unfurl. And after the trio haughtily announced to him that they were moving their operation into the area, said flags began flapping like someone left the window open during typhoon season. Long story short, the three were arrested for impersonating police officers. Yet the question remained: What the cockamamie fuck are the Masonic Police?
It appears that Henry, Hayes, and Kiel all firmly believed that they really were law enforcement officers, despite having absolutely no credentials whatsoever. Well, at least none that the actual authorities (or anyone in their right mind, for that matter) would consider to be based in reality. As self-proclaimed descendants of the Knights Templar, they were under the impression that their "police" organization originated 3,000 years ago and that they were well within their rights to possess the multitude of badges, uniforms, marked cars, and weapons that turned up after numerous search warrants were issued. They also claimed to have jurisdiction in 33 states and Mexico, with 33 coincidentally being the magic Illuminati number of the Order Of Ascension in the Scottish Rites Of Freemasonry. I'm sure that I don't need to dwell on how pretty much all of that is a gigantic pile of donkey cock. But feel free to use this shithouse-rat-crazy website for reference.
Supreme Sovereign Grand Master David Henry X
But, more importantly, who is he wearing????