David Hanley Stopped A Plane Hijacking With A Cadillac
Despite the billions of hours we collectively spend in airport security every day, hijackings aren't a very common threat. It wasn't always like that, though. In 1972 alone, 72 different airplanes were hijacked. Today, passengers complain about having to take off their shoes in a crowd of annoyed strangers -- in the '70s, they complained about getting taken to Cuba with a gun in their face. The skies were gripped in the fist of terror! But on June 23, 1972, a hero rose.
It was in St. Louis, where a madman named Martin J. McNally seized American Airlines Flight 119 while it was still on the ground. He was armed with a submachine gun and demanded parachutes and half a million dollars. While the police were delicately trying to defuse the situation, a random businessman was watching live coverage of the hijacking in a hotel bar 10 miles away. He was David Hanley, and he was about to earn the most spectacular DUI in history.
"Six more of these, bartender. I'm about to need all the liquid courage I can get."
David had an awesome idea that ended in "this" and started with "fuck." He got angry and told his friend, "Turn on the radio in a few minutes and you'll hear something that will rock the world." It was a little corny, and stupid since the news would be on the TV his friend was already watching, but David Hanley was a man of action, not words.
A few minutes later, Flight 119 was taxiing down the runway to take off. This is when David Hanley, world rocker, plowed through the airport fence in his wife's Cadillac convertible, sped past all manner of law enforcement, chased down the moving airplane, and fucking crashed into the Boeing 727's landing gear at 80 miles an hour. All of that is insane, and here's what's more insane: It worked.
McNally, the man who hijacked an airliner with a machine gun, actually said, "Gee whiz, that guy must be nuts!" It was a move so crazy, even the madman had to admire it. And more than that, it disabled the plane. Hanley suffered some serious injuries, but he beat up an entire airplane. The only fatality was Mrs. Hanley's Cadillac.
"Honey, I have good news. Your car died a hero."
"I'm divorcing you."
But, seriously though, she did actually divorce him.