Through 70 years of publication, Batman has braved many adventures that push the limits of the imagination.

These are the stupid ones.

Detective Comics: 241

This is what happens when Batman is written by Liberace.

Also, Robin can call it red all he wants, but according to our Crayola box set, Batman's costume is actually pretty-princess-pink.

Batman: 48

"And that concludes our presentation of the Batcave. Any questions? Yes, you the kid in the back."

"So your bat-cave is right under Bruce Wayne's house?"

"You betcha!"

"And the only entrance is through a staircase connected to Bruce Wayne's house, right?"

"Right again!"

" you are Bruce Wayne, then?"

"Ah- Oh. Well, that's an interesting question with a pretty --HOLY SHIT SMOKE BOMB! " ::Batman throws smoke bomb and runs off::

Detective Comics: 339

Detective Comics: 119

"And this is what I'm going to do to goddamn stupid Batman and Robin! I am going to throw this snowball with a rock in it right into their stupid faces! And then I'm going to kick them in their tiny dicks while they are on the ground going all 'Oooh! Please don't kill us Mister Criminal!'"

"Pete... Pete! For fuck's sake, shut up!"

"In a second, I'm telling Snow-Batman here what I'm about to do to his dead mother's corpse."

Batman: 122

Batman: 209

Detective Comics: 106

"Hey, Ralph; I have to draw this cover and... are libraries the places with paintings or the places with books?"

"Are you shitting me, Bob?"

"Ha ha! Yes, yes... I am just kidding. Of course I know what a library is. I am not that dumb! What kind of moron doesn't know what a library is, am I right?"

Batman: 134

We think the cover artist is complaining about the writers' ability to write believable human beings. That's okay, the writer gets to defend himself next issue when he writes "Batman and the Strange Case of the Cover Artist Who Was Crushed by a Mountain of Dicks He Tried to Suck and His Mom Was a Big Whore, Too." (part 1 of 4)

Batman: 183

Batman: 147

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