BLOG: Sometimes I write about odd stuff that cracked won't publish. Sometimes I put up the full articles before the editors cut them down to size. Sometimes I just try to piss people off. (http://thelastmonte.wordpress.com)
CRAPTIONS: And lastly you can find me in the Craptions forums regularly where I judge and make smartass remarks. (http://www.cracked.com/forums/forum/craption-contest)
There's not much else to say really, except perhaps:
I'm a ninja for hire
An ice cube on fire
A soothsayer and liar
Deceitful, dashing and dire
A menacing muse muddling meanings in the mire
My mind tumbles around like a cat in a dryer
When its down to the wire I get lit like a pyre
Kicking hobbits out the shire
In jet black attire like a cocaine supplier
Cuz I aspire to acquire your ire
And all you sucker MCs can call me sire...
I am also available for freelance work depending upon how pretty you are.
Number Of Articles: 36
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