thelastmonte

thelastmonte's Cracked photo
  • Real Name: Monte Richard
  • Location: Louisiana
  • Member Since: April 15th, 2011
  • Last Seen: July 25th, 2014 6:09 pm
  • Personal tag line: The M. Night Shaylaman of Comedy
  • Message board posts: 1,484

About thelastmonte

COMICS: I throw up comics for Real Toy Gun with a few of the boys from the Craption forums. Soon to become a real website. (realtoygun.blogspot.com)

BLOG: Sometimes I write about odd stuff that cracked won't publish. Sometimes I put up the full articles before the editors cut them down to size. Sometimes I just try to piss people off. (http://thelastmonte.wordpress.com)

CRAPTIONS: And lastly you can find me in the Craptions forums regularly where I judge and make smartass remarks. (http://www.cracked.com/forums/forum/craption-contest)


There's not much else to say really, except perhaps:

I'm a ninja for hire
An ice cube on fire
A soothsayer and liar
Deceitful, dashing and dire
A menacing muse muddling meanings in the mire
My mind tumbles around like a cat in a dryer
When its down to the wire I get lit like a pyre
Kicking hobbits out the shire
In jet black attire like a cocaine supplier
Cuz I aspire to acquire your ire
And all you sucker MCs can call me sire...

I am also available for freelance work depending upon how pretty you are.


Number Of Articles: 36

Articles

The 6 Most Mind-Blowing Animal Senses

| 538,978 views

7 Reasons Ants Will Inherit the Earth

| 616,752 views

5 Fish Clearly Designed by a Madman

| 1,093,441 views

6 Devices Made for Aquatic Supervillainy

| 414,201 views

The 6 Most Disturbingly Evil Birds

| 1,141,585 views

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