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41 Crazy Ways It’s Apparently Possible to Cheat Death

By:: Brian C. Miller; Cracked Writers

August 18, 2023

41 Crazy Ways It’s Apparently Possible to Cheat Death

In the Final Destination series, a group of teenagers somehow manage to cheat death, and then spend the rest of the movie running from elaborate “natural” Rube Goldberg style machinations of murder. Finding yourself in one of those situations is pretty unlikely, but if you ever happen to, you’ll be glad that you read this list of surprising ways to cheat death…

40 Sucked up into a storm? Just pass out!

EWA WISNIERSKA GOT YANKED UP WHILE PARAGLIDING. SHE WOUND UP SIX MILES ABOVE THE GROUND. That's cruising altitude for airplanes. Finally, after an hour in a storm pilots wouldn't fly a 747 through, she managed to land safely. Doctors say the only reason she survived was she passed out, which put her in a less oxygen-needy state. CRACKED.COM — Source: People Who Survived Completely Unsurvivable Situations

39 Surviving decapitation belongs on your resume

SHANNON MALLOY GOT AN UNUSUAL INJURY. DOCTORS CALL IT AN INTERNAL DECAPITATION. A car crash severed every ligament and tendon connecting her skull to her spinal cord. Her head was connected to her body only by skin and muscle tissue. She eventually recovered from the ordeal, and even avoided being paralyzed. CRACKED.COM — Source: People Who Survived Completely Unsurvivable Situations

38 That's one way to handle it

CARL AKELEY'S GUN FAILED TO KILL AN ATTACKING LEOPARD. SO НЕ JAMMED HIS HAND DOWN ITS THROAT. The cat, initially surprised its dinner was doing all the work for it, soon found itself suffocating. Ignoring the pain of being partially eaten, Akeley kept right on pushing, saving himself and choking the beast from the inside. CRACKED.COM — Source: People Who Survived Completely Unsurvivable Situations

37 He broke the chair

WILLIE FRANCIS, 16, WAS ACCUSED OF MURDER IN 1946. THE EVIDENCE WAS SLIM, BUT THEY SENT HIM TO THE CHAIR. It didn't take long for an all-white jury to convict Francis and sentence him to death. But though he was zapped with enough electricity to make the 300-pound electric chair move, Francis survived, and the machine broke down around him. CRACKED.COM — Source: People Who Survived Completely Unsurvivable Situations

36 Out of the frying pan and into the fire ants

SKYDIVER JOAN MURRAY'S PARACHUTE FAILED TO OPEN. THE FALL SHATTERED THE RIGHT SIDE OF HER BODY. She landed on a mound of 250,000 fire ants. But she survived long enough to be transferred to the hospital, where she recovered. In fact, it's even possible that her 200-plus ant stings saved her by stimulating her body to keep going. CRACKED.COM — Source: People Who Survived Completely Unsurvivable Situations

35 Facing Off Against a Grizzly

41 Crazy Ways It’s Apparently Possible to Cheat Death — Source: 19 Awesome Survival Tips (You’ll Probably Never Need)

34 Fast Food Is Finally Good For You

CRACKED.COM Junaias If during the apocalypse-by-tornado you happen to be in a vehicle, drive OLD FASHI to the nearest fast food restaurant.IBUR OThey usually have at least one BURC walk-in cooler that will work TAMO as the perfect shelter. Bolton TUN OUR chicken 'n b S P C is — Source: 19 Awesome Survival Tips (You’ll Probably Never Need)

33 Survive the robot apocalypse

HAVE THE ROBOTS TAKEN OVER? ACCORDING TO DR RICHARDSON OF LEEDS UNIVERSITY, YOUR BEST BET IS TO VISUALLY CONFUSE THE MACHINES SO THEY CAN'T FIND YOU... ...BY PAINTING YOUR HIDEOUT WITH LOTS OF LINES AND COMPLEX PATTERNS! CRACKED COM — Source: 19 Awesome Survival Tips (You’ll Probably Never Need)

32 Lose your shirt!

41 Crazy Ways It’s Apparently Possible to Cheat Death — Source: 19 Awesome Survival Tips (You’ll Probably Never Need)

31 Did you survive an explosion?

YOU JUST SURVIVED AN EXPLOSION? FORGET ABOUT WALKING AWAY ALL COOL AND SUAVE. ONE HIT THE FLOOR BOMB AND CHECK YOUR USUALLY PERIMETER. MEANS THERE IS ANOTHER ONE. CRACKED.COM — Source: 19 Awesome Survival Tips (You’ll Probably Never Need)

30 Scream at the elephant

If you happen to run into an elephant and he seems to be preparing to charge CRACKED.COM THE BEST THING YOU CAN DO IS SCREAM AND YELL AT HIM. — Source: 19 Awesome Survival Tips (You’ll Probably Never Need)

29 Lone Star Ticks Prevent Zombies

Have hordes of zombies taken over your town? CRACKED.COM Fight back by unleashing Lone Star ticks. Once bitten, these ticks cause an allergy to mammal meat. After eating red meat, an affected zombie will go into anaphylactic shock resulting in death when left untreated. — Source: 19 Awesome Survival Tips (You’ll Probably Never Need)

28 19 bullets

POLICE HAVE BRUTALLY KILLED MANY PEOPLE. IN BIESSED MEMORY OF SEAN BELL au BLACK MAT PAYA POR A 13332 BUT JOSEPH GUZMAN TOOK 19 BULLETS AND SURVIVED. And that doesn't count the 31 additional bullets cops fired at him, which missed. Not only did he survive the shooting, but Joseph was also still strong enough to be described as combative when he was wheeled into the hospital. CRACKED.COM — Source: People Who Survived Completely Unsurvivable Situations

27 This guy is invincible to nails or something

AN OREGON MAN PUT A NAIL GUN TO HIS OWN HEAD. A DOZEN NAILS IN THE BRAIN FAILED TO KILL HIM. Не finally went to the hospital and complained that he and ... had a headache. The nails had gone so far into his brain that the doctors couldn't even see them until they X-rayed his head. They had to remove the nails with needle-nosed pliers and a drill. CRACKED.COM — Source: People Who Survived Completely Unsurvivable Situations

26 Pvt. Moss survived a rocket grenade

A ROCKET-PROPELLED GRENADE IMPALED PVT. MOSS. MOUNTAIN THIS WAS SO DANGEROUS, THEY COULDN'T EXTRACT HIM. So, his commanding officer lied and said it was just shrapnel. Doctors finally sawed the fins off the rocket and pulled the tube out of him. Incredibly, the huge projectile missed his vital organs, and Moss lived. CRACKED.COM — Source: People Who Survived Completely Unsurvivable Situations

25 Saburo Sakai's cockpit exploded

SABURO SAKAI'S COCKPIT EXPLODED DURING WW2. SAKAI HIMSELF WAS SHOT SQUARE IN THE FOREHEAD. This removed a chunk of his brain, blinded his right eye, and paralyzed the left half of his body. But Sakai pulled up, wiped away the blood with his scarf, and made the five-hour flight back to his base. Of the 150 pilots in his unit, he was one of just three to survive. CRACKED.COM — Source: People Who Survived Completely Unsurvivable Situations

24 Jacob Miller shouldn't have survived this!

Source: People Who Survived Completely Unsurvivable Situations

23 Mike Day took a beating for sure

NAVY SEAL MIKE DAY WAS IN IRAQ'S ANBAR PROVINCE. AL-QAEDA MILITANTS SHOT HIM 27 TIMES FROM 10 FEET AWAY. Then they threw a grenade at him. With his rifle gone, Swiss cheese for armor, and a body full of new holes and shrapnel, Day pulled his sidearm and dropped all four insurgents. Не then stood up, cleared the rest of the house, and walked to his helicopter. CRACKED.COM — Source: People Who Survived Completely Unsurvivable Situations

22 Hippos are not a joke

A HIPPO CRASHED INTO PAUL TEMPLER'S KAYAK. HALF HIS BODY WAS SOON DOWN ITS THROAT. Не got out, but the hippo's tusks then impaled him 40 times. Templer struggled to the surface and was dragged to shore by another kayaker. Не owes his life to a guide who managed to seal his collapsing lung with a plastic snack wrapper. CRACKED.COM — Source: People Who Survived Completely Unsurvivable Situations

21 A great line in any situation

THE SOYUZ 5 SPACE MODULE WENT HAYWIRE ON REENTRY. IT HIT THE EARTH LIKE A METEOR. The ship's parachute failed. So did the rockets designed to soften the landing. When cosmonaut Boris Volynov got out, it was -36 degrees Fahrenheit. But when the rescue team arrived hours later, his only comment was, Is my hair gray? CRACKED.COM — Source: People Who Survived Completely Unsurvivable Situations

20 Doctors hate him!

TRUMAN DUNCAN FELL OFF A MOVING TRAIN. IT CUT HIS BODY IN HALF AT THE WAIST. aturePits It pulled him under the wheels, and he was alive and conscious as it dragged him 75 feet. Doctors don't know how he survived. Maybe the wheels' weight kept him from bleeding to death (though not very well, since he lost half the blood in his body). CRACKED.COM — Source: People Who Survived Completely Unsurvivable Situations

19 We would have given up long before this

JAKE GARROW WAS PLOWING SNOW ON ICE IN ONTARIO. HIS SKID LOADER PLUNGED DOWN THROUGH THE ICE. Не smashed the back window out with his elbow and swam 100 feet through pitch-black, ice-covered water. Then he had to walk a mile to the main road in soaking wet clothes with a wind chill of -22 degrees Fahrenheit to hitch a ride to the hospital. CRACKED.COM — Source: People Who Survived Completely Unsurvivable Situations

18 Weird Luck on This One

ALISTAIR URQUHART SURRENDERED TO JAPAN. FOR TWO YEARS IN WW2, НЕ WAS BEATEN AND STARVED. Then they took him aboard a ship ... which sank. Не was rescued and taken to Nagasaki. Urquhart was working in a coal mine when the atomic bomb hit. But he survived, and he survived a further 70 years, living in Scotland till the ripe old age of 97. CRACKED.COM — Source: People Who Survived Completely Unsurvivable Situations

17 Once again, just get blasted out of danger!

CHARLES LIGHTOLLER SANK WITH THE TITANIC. THEN THE BOILERS EXPLODED, BLOWING HIM TO THE SURFACE. Не rallied 30 survivors onto a capsized lifeboat-the very last lifeboat to be found. Не went on to survive two more shipwrecks. Then in 1918, he rammed his ship into a German submarine, sinking it and earning him a medal. CRACKED.COM — Source: People Who Survived Completely Unsurvivable Situations

16 Get to the high ground!

An asteroid is about to hit the Earth? Run to the hills! Our planet is mostly covered by oceans, so it's more likely it will fall in a body of water than on land. If so what you need to worry about the most is the tsunami CRACKED.COM that will form afterwards. Your best chance of survival? Get to higher ground. — Source: 19 Awesome Survival Tips (You’ll Probably Never Need)

15 Survive a smothering

YOU ARE BEING SMOTHERED WITH A PILLOW! Just like in the movies! 1. Don't panic. Most pillows are quite porous so you can still breathe slowly. If you can, turn your head sideways to catch more air. 2. Push. If you're significantly stronger than your attacker you might be able to push yourself off the bed; otherwise... 3. Play dead Struggling wastes air and energy, prolonging the attack. If your assailant has watched too many movies he'll give up long before your situation becomes critical. CRACKED.COM — Source: 19 Awesome Survival Tips (You’ll Probably Never Need)

14 Buried alive?

So, you're buried alive, huh? First, stop panicking; rapid breathing will use up all your air. Next, wrap your head in your shirt to prevent you from breathing or eating dirt. Now, kick at the coffin lid as hard as you can. Once it's breached, use your hands and legs to pack the dirt inside the coffin as you make your way out. And put that candle out. Fire consumes oxygen. GRACKED.COM — Source: 19 Awesome Survival Tips (You’ll Probably Never Need)

13 Just be a pain in the butt

CRACKED COM IF YOU'RE BEING CONSTRICTED BY A PYTHON, BE TOO MUCH TROUBLE TO BE WORTH IT You'll never be able to pry it off of you, but you can annoy it into slithering off to more docile prey. Bite it and poke at its eyes, and with luck it'll be too frustrated and leave you alone. — Source: 19 Awesome Survival Tips (You’ll Probably Never Need)

12 How to avoid piranhas

You're swimming in the Amazon River when you notice a shoal of piranhas surrounding you. How screwed are you? That depends. If you don't have an open wound, you are unlikely to be on their radar. Swim out of there quietly and do not make any loud splashes. If you do have an open wound, swim out as fast as you can and treat your bite wounds. Real-life piranhas are not fast eaters, so you'll probably live. CRACKED.COM — Source: 19 Awesome Survival Tips (You’ll Probably Never Need)

11 You're good if you can find a cruise ship!

GRACKED.COM If dust or ash ever completely covers the Earth's atmosphere and causes global disaster, head to a cruise ship! Cruise ships have food, water and medical supplies. Even though you will have to restock eventually, you'll survive the initial fallout. For maximum survival rate, sail out to the middle of the ocean. If the atmospheric cover is caused by volcanoes, the middle of the ocean is farthest away from most of them. — Source: 19 Awesome Survival Tips (You’ll Probably Never Need)

10 Just keep poking and grabbing

RODNEY FOX WAS FISHING FOR TUNA IN AUSTRALIA. A GREAT WHITE SHARK SNAPPED HIM NEARLY IN TWO. It broke half his ribs, ripping him up so much, his suit was the only thing holding his insides in. But Rodney didn't realize how much he'd been injured, so he just poked and grabbed at the shark till it moved on. Не went on to found an organization to protect sharks. CRACKED.COM — Source: People Who Survived Completely Unsurvivable Situations

9 Your head's pretty strong, we guess

SCIENTISTS ASSESSED THE GALERAS VOLCANO IN 1993. IT ERUPTED WHILE THEY WERE THERE. A blast of heat reduced one engineer to ash. Two others instantly turned to gas. Dr. Stanley Williams took a rock to the head, shattering his skull and sending bone fragments deep into his brain. But when rescue arrived, he was alive, and he made a full recovery. CRACKED.COM — Source: People Who Survived Completely Unsurvivable Situations

8 If you're gonna fall, fall in extreme cold we guess

A TWO-YEAR-OLD FELL IN FREEZING WATER. HIS HEART STOPPED FOR AN HOUR AND 41 MINUTES. The boy's body temperature dropped to 77 degrees. Over an hour of CPR failed to resuscitate him. But then, against all probability, he came back to life. Apparently, the extreme cold preserved his brain and other organs. CRACKED.COM — Source: People Who Survived Completely Unsurvivable Situations

7 Get thrown out of danger

THE SS ANDREA DORIA WAS THE SAFEST SHIP IN ITALY. ANDREA GENO THEN THE SS STOCKHOLMHIT IT, KILLING FIFTY INSTANTLY. Not killed: Linda Morgan, 14. The impact propelled her bed out of her cabin, out of the Doria entirely, and all the way onto the Stockholm's damaged bow. She landed safely behind a bulkhead and was really confused when she woke up on a different boat. CRACKED.COM — Source: People Who Survived Completely Unsurvivable Situations

6 For potential astronauts

CRACKED.COM Oh, no! You've been sucked into space without a suit! DON'T HOLD YOUR BREATH! Expel the air from your lungs instead to prevent it from rupturing your lung tissue upon expanding. You'll still need to be rescued pretty quickly, but your chances of survival will be better with functional lungs. — Source: 19 Awesome Survival Tips (You’ll Probably Never Need)

5 Survive a Kidnapping

41 Crazy Ways It’s Apparently Possible to Cheat Death — Source: 19 Awesome Survival Tips (You’ll Probably Never Need)

4 Don't make eye contact with the wolves

STALKED BY WOLVES? Avoid making eye contact or threatening behavior and back away slowly. If there are no other people nearby, look for fire or a tree to climb. If the wolf starts to snarl and act aggressively, assert yourself; try to intimidate it by making noise and waving your arms. If you're attacked, protect your face and throat. Keep trying to escape and don't give up. CRACKED.COM — Source: 19 Awesome Survival Tips (You’ll Probably Never Need)

3 Stop birds with your shirt

CHASED BY A FLOCK OF ANGRY BIRD'S? USE YOUR SHIRT AS A SHIELD! Many birds can't peck hard enough to break your skin, so keep your head down and your eyes covered if possible and you will (probably) be fine. If carrying food, throw it well away, flail your arms and make loud noises while you run for cover! GRACKED.COM — Source: 19 Awesome Survival Tips (You’ll Probably Never Need)

2 Give the monkey your food

ARE YOU BEING ATTACKED BY A PISSED OFF MONKEY? GIVE IT YOUR FOOD Monkey aggression is usually because they want food. If you have food, throw it to them. If you don't, show them your palms, so it knows you're not holding. GRACKED COM Don't show fear, and don't smile - showing your teeth is a sign of weakness to primates. — Source: 19 Awesome Survival Tips (You’ll Probably Never Need)

1 Don't open your doors!

CRACKED.COM IF YOUR CAR Goes FLYING INTO THE WATER, DO пот open YOUR DOORS Opening the doors lets in too much water too fast, so stick with the windows. If the window's electrical components still work, roll your windows down and climb out. If they are damaged, you'll have to wait for the car to fill with water. Take a big breath at the last possible second, open the door, and swim for the surface. — Source: 19 Awesome Survival Tips (You’ll Probably Never Need)

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