It all started when a guy gave me this fiddle. And I took it because, hey, free fiddle.
Not surprisingly, everything Hollywood taught us about fast driving is wrong.
Approximately 30 percent of the energy used to heat or cool your house flies right out the window, like a dog who just saw a squirrel.
People apparently assumed that crime ceased to exist once you were five miles above the Earth, or that commercial aircraft were under the jurisdiction of Zeus, King of Olympus.
Despite what they sell, the flower industry is not always a pretty business -- filled with slavery, disease, and pain.
When you and the person you decide to spend the rest of your life with are from different countries, you face issues that homonational couples would never even think about.
Some people refuse to tell lies, or behave rationally, or do anything that wasn't 100 times worse than just being late for whatever it was they were late for.
Always read the fine print, unless you're into winning 5-ton paper weights.
Many of the horrors of your childhood came from things designed specifically for children. We wonder if kids even knew they were playing nightmare fuel, or if they just rolled with it.
Roosh V is so perfectly hateable, I'm still not entirely convinced that he isn't part of a secret marketing campaign by Big Rape Whistle.
If you like the fact that you're able to read this article on your smartphone, congratulations -- you and your damn space debris will kill us all.
These people literally took their old work and tried to pass it off as new without changing a single thing.
Guys, we've gone and done it: we broke hipsters. Now we need a fresh new stereotype to joke about/lust after (depending on your alignment) for the next few years.
I wanted a job that utilized my skills learned from a lifetime of watching muscular men in burnt t-shirts save the world. Since I couldn't get a job throwing Hans Gruber off a roof, I decided to join the fire department.
Disclaimer: If you are currently suffering from an immediate life-threatening condition, note that we are not condoning doing anything stupid like these.