Cracked Archive - Tech

4 Things You Learn Quickly About Internet Hate

After a decade knee-deep in e-opinion, this is what the Internet has taught me about the Internet.


5 Reasons to Be Terrified That Computers Can Now Read Faces

Recognizing you is just the beginning -- the goal is to create software that can all but read your goddamned mind. Don't believe us? Guess what -- the technology exists.


8 Insane Vehicles You Won't Believe Are Street Legal

As long as there are wheels to spin and jet engines to slap on things that should not have jet engines, mankind's irrepressible need to go ungodly speeds while looking completely ludicrous shall not be sated.


4 Things Movies Always Get Wrong About Computer Hackers

Everything you've learned from Hollywood about hacking has utterly failed to communicate just how boring it actually is.


5 Clues Hidden in Computer Files That Can Get You Busted

You leave digital fingerprints all over everything you do on a computer, and unfortunately for bad guys, it doesn't exactly take a CSI team to find them.


The 12 Most Ridiculous Old-Timey Transportation Innovations

Nobody was ever more batshit crazy than old-timey inventors. Ever.


5 Weapon Myths You Probably Believe (Thanks to Movies)

You might want to put on some comfy pants and get out a tub of consolation ice cream, because we're about to let you way, way down.


6 Real Cyber Attacks Straight Out of a Bad Hacker Movie

n movies, computers can blow up houses, shut down highways, release plagues and make Matthew Lillard appealing to women. However, our collective groaning about how laughably unrealistic these movies are may have been premature ...


5 Military Weapons Clearly Designed by a 5-Year-Old

There's a pretty big difference between what works in a cartoon and what works in real life. But military generals and weapons designers both have an inner child who still likes to draw super awesome weapons on the back of a notebook.


5 Social Networking Sins You Don't Know You're Committing

Cardinal rules of social networking that I've blundered through in the past weeks. Hopefully you can use this advice to avoid breaking the same rules yourself, or perhaps more likely, deliberately break them many times simply to troll people.


12 Dangerously Irresponsible Steps to Building Your Own PC

Building a computer? If you're anything like me, this is not going to go very well for you.


5 Things Technology Will Never Fix (And Why)

It's time to draw the line, and stop coddling our lazy, shiftless technologies. Here are the five biggest technological annoyances that still plague our devices each day.


How Google Image Search Made Me a World-Famous Moron

I discovered recently that hundreds of websites all over the western world feature my face, pressed hard against the driver's side window of a Toyota Camry (Limited Edition), staring at a set of keys locked hopelessly inside.


The 7 Most Overused Words on the Internet

These words tell us everything we need to know about the commenter and let us skip the post, safe in the knowledge that we're proving our childhood lessons wrong and getting smarter by not reading something.


5 Ways the Modern World Makes You Extremely Easy to Stalk

Almost every advanced gadget we use presents another crack that a creepy or malicious person could pry open if they got the urge to stalk us.