Cracked Archive - Sex
5 Gross Products For Your Nether Hygiene
It's like the manufacturers just came up with the stupidest idea they could and then expected people to slather it all over their genitals.
- By Pauli Poisuo
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- February 18, 2017
The Skeeviest Things I Saw Working At An Adult Movie Theater
Like the drive-in, the wank theater is mostly gone. A few have managed to stick around, though, and we spoke to the former manager of one.
- By Cezary Jan Strusiewicz
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- February 15, 2017
What Movies Get Wrong About BDSM Relationships
There are people out there who are in 24/7 master/slave relationships, complete with collars and/or certificates tagging them as lifelong partners.
- By Cezary Jan Strusiewicz
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- February 14, 2017
6 Real Examples Of Sex Ed Gone Disastrously Awry
Warning: Though this article does contain themes of a sexual nature, most of it will prove difficult to masturbate to. Godspeed and good luck.
- By JM McNab
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- January 22, 2017
5 Ways Evolution Designed Your Body To Be Awesome At Sex
Our bodies seem to have either been designed by a dysfunctional committee or a very cruel prankster.
- By Eamon Lahiri
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- January 15, 2017
8 Easy Steps To Convince Your Husband To Get A Vasectomy
Apparently, there is something about shutting off my husband's sperm flow that doesn't appeal to him on a basic man-level. So I set out to change his mind.
- By Kathy Benjamin
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- December 28, 2016
5 Bleak Examples Of 'Social Issue' Porn (Which Is A Thing?)
Imagine any social issue that gets your blood boiling, and then imagine poorly scripted sexy talk and money shots added in.
- By Ian Fortey
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- December 18, 2016
6 Realities Of Life When Your Mom Is A Working Prostitute
We spoke to 'Felicia,' whose mother worked at a New Zealand brothel when Felicia was a teenager. Here's what we learned.
- By Amanda Mannen
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- December 14, 2016
Super Creepy Sex Toys For Super Creepy People
WARNING: What's about to come is painfully NSFW.
- By Pauli Poisuo
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- December 11, 2016
5 Sex Toys That Invent Horrifying New Ways To Multi-Task
Have you ever thought about combining your no doubt many and varied non-sexual bad habits with your, uh, sexual habits?
- By Pauli Poisuo
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- November 29, 2016
The Complicated Realities Of Living With A Quicksand Fetish
In 1932, Hollywood introduced the movie-going public to the concept of drowning movie extras in quicksand, and to everybody's surprise, we started masturbating. Here's a closer look at this phenomenon.
- By Robert Evans
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- October 15, 2016
7 X-Rated Traditions That Prove History Was Horny As F#@%
Men and women have been shamelessly horny lizards ever since the Stone Age.
- By Marina Reimann
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- August 28, 2016
The 5 Most Indefensible Sex Scenes In Superhero Movies
Sex in comic book movies is about as awkward as sex in a comic book store.
- By Felix Clay
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- August 26, 2016
6 Hilarious X-Rated Artifacts From Early Computers
It was not that long ago that humanity had to resort to insanely elaborate or plain ridiculous methods just to do something as natural as looking at naked people in a computer screen.
- By Adam Wears, Marina Reimann
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- August 21, 2016
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