Cracked Archive - News

Cecil The Lion Made You A Moron: 5 Stages Of Facebook Rage

Every huge outrage is inevitably locked in one of the following five stages before it dissipates into wistful nothingness, like a gentle fart in a raging typhoon.


6 Ways Critics Of Political Correctness Have It Backwards

I dug into some of the 'PC Suckz00rz' arguments and quickly realized that not only are they wrong, they're exactly wrong, which is sort of impressive.


The 13 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (8/18)

Staying on top of current events is like trying to drink from a fire hose, only instead of a hydrant it's hooked up to a sewer line.


6 Absurdly Pathetic Last-Ditch Protests Against Gay Marriage

Sometimes the opponents' plans are so ridiculous that you almost have to admire their dedication to being terrible.


5 Stories That Should Make The Anti-Vax Movement Worry

It's been a banner year so far for the anti-vaccination movement. But not everything is rubella and roses for the anti-vaxxers.


The 13 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (8/11)

The news reads like a very long PSA on why civilization was a bad idea.


5 Ways Stand-Up Comics Hate Free Speech

Sometimes, it seems like comics are the only ones fighting for our right to say whatever we want without fear of repercussions. Except that's not even sort of true.


The 14 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (8/4)

Staying on top of current events is like trying to keep an accurate count of the wolves who are currently chasing you through the woods.


5 Insane Police Forces That Have Zero Right To Arrest You

It's not easy being a cop. So imagine how frustrating it must be when they run across organized groups of half-cocked, wannabe, do-gooding amateurs like these people.


5 Ways College Screws Over Poor Kids

There are a whole bunch of really smart, motivated, hard-working people who aren't being given a shot at a real education.


The 13 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (7/28)

Judging from the news, the cabal of powerful people who secretly run the world have all dropped a shitload of acid recently.


5 Incredibly Positive Trends No One's Talking About

If you take a moment to stop actively focusing on the negative, it's easy to see that, despite our collective insistence to the contrary, the world as a whole is chugging along towards a better place.


6 News Stories Everybody Needs To Stop Sharing On Facebook

Stop making the world a worse place.


I Buy Human Teeth: 4 Realities Of A Weird Black Market

Where do your teeth go after they've been pulled out of your screaming skull by a sadist with a light on his forehead?


6 Brothels that Turn Sex Into A Day At An Amusement Park

Even though the basic product is still the same (roof, prostitutes, wet-naps, shame), there's apparently still room for some forward-thinking innovation.