Cracked Archive - News

The 15 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (5/9/17)

The news outlets are the Tamagotchis of the new millennium.

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6 Underreported Reasons Why The NY Times Totally Sucks

Not to sound like Trump, but there are actually several reasons to harbor a strong dislike for the 'NYT.'

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A 10th Grader Explains The Civil War To Donald Trump

I feel like Lincoln was bad at his job. Couldn't he have just, like, given the South a Pepsi?

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A Zero B.S. Guide To American Healthcare

Why the hell is it so difficult to make major changes to the healthcare system in America?

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Here's 10 Amazing Things You Probably Didn't Know (4/30/17)

At no cost whatsoever, here are some completely true facts you can use to spice up your small talk.

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Why The Fyre Festival Attendees Should've Seen It Coming

What music fan with $12,000 to spare wouldn't jump at the chance to drop that on a chance to see Ja Rule? Ja Rule!

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5 Deeply Embarrassing Things The News Keeps Doing

Our ability to share massive amounts of information also means we can share massive amounts of garbage.

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How Do You Make A Public Apology? Not Like This

Hey, Jesse Watters. Blowjob mic guy. Can I call you Blowjob Mike? Cool.

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The 15 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (5/2/17)

Some weeks it seems like the news media is deliberately punking you.

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Simply Staggering Facts About The Opioid Epidemic

Pharmaceutical companies make Walter White look like an amateur.

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6 Historical Hoaxes That Are Too Stupid Even For 2017

The concept of fake news isn't entirely fake.

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The Terrifying Shortage Nobody Is Talking About

America is running out of poison.

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Here's 10 Amazing Things You Probably Didn't Know (4/23/17)

You're welcome for making you a much more interesting person to the people screaming obscenities at you on Xbox.

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Let's Crunch The Numbers Behind Bill O'Reilly's 'Punishment'

Bill O'Reilly isn't returning to Fox News because he sexually harassed five women. No, he's not returning because of math.

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The 15 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (4/25/17)

Sorting through news headlines is like archaeology -- there's a ton of digging, there's so much dirt, and anything good you find is usually broken.

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