Thanks to several laws I'd broken, I had found out where my cyber-bully attended school, and with the help of an underfunded administration in desperate need of two cartons of Marlboros, I was able to enroll myself in the 7th grade of Alan Thicke Middle School.
Dear Fine People of Hazleton Township, Pennsylvania, It is from the bottom of my heart and at the request of the West Hazleton Superior Court that I apologize to you all for what transpired last Saturday at the Hazleton Youth Center.
Often the weirdest partnerships are the ones the movies don't seem to think are wacky at all. These are the cohorts and conspirators that, in real life, would have no reason to trust each other with a lunch order, let alone their lives.
This should go without saying, but I'll say it anyway: I'm going to spoil everything in every sense of the term, for everybody. I'm going to spoil the TV show, I'm going to spoil the books and I'm probably going to spoil your overall sunny outlook on life.
The title of the TV show â€˜Grey's Anatomyâ€™ is what you would get if someone with brain damage free-associated the words â€˜Greyâ€™ and â€˜medicalâ€™ and tried to explain their thought process.
But I'm not looking for sequels just for the sake of making sequels. Some movies leave amazing little ideas completely unexplored, because sometimes there's just too much awesomeness to cram into one movie. That's what I'm talking about.
We have a feeling that Harry Potter is never going away. Which is fine because we love talking about how pants-crappingly terrifying that whole universe is.
Occasionally, a movie chooses to kill completely innocent characters in the most horrible way possible for no discernible reason.
You can tell a lot about a person by whose name they're shouting when they wake up drenched in their own urine. But unless they're getting disemboweled by Freddy Krueger or in a Christopher Nolan film, we rarely get to look at what evil lurks in the wetmares of famous fictional characters. Until now.
Perhaps the most important question that shows like Sherlock, House, and Luther raise is this: What's the difference between being a troubled, misunderstood soul, and just being an asshole?
It's hard to imagine the Predator or Jabba the Hutt as anything other than the iconic beasts we know and love. But they and others evolved from ideas that at the concept stage were very, very different. And very, very stupid.