Contrary to what NASA tells you, simply being the first white guy to walk on something does not earn you a free ride. No, the real rewards only come if you can whip the masses up into an orgiastic frenzy of greed. Like these guys.
The Academy Awards are like Hollywood's Super Bowl (what with the betting pools, the bean dip, the coma-inducing length) but with one important difference: Super Bowl rings are actually awarded on merit.
