Absolutely Nobody Is Seeing ‘Morbius’ Judging From Ticket Sales
Just a week ago, the United States was overwhelmed by a horrifying bout of what can only be described as “Morbius Fever.” Hordes of people were compelled to gather together and spend literal American dollars on an hour and forty-four minutes of abject nonsense that somehow didn’t even manage to grasp the basic fundamentals of how a cat litter box works. Some sufferers of Morbius Fever even reported having late-night visions of a hirsute gentleman dressed like a recently-divorced Col. Sanders.
But now Morbius Fever has been all but been eradicated from the U.S. After scoring the number one spot at the domestic box office on its opening weekend, this past weekend, Morbius fell to second place behind Sonic the Hedgehog 2 (and we’ll bet that the makers of Morbius are really kicking themselves right now for not finding a role for Knuckles in their film). Not only that, but Morbius’ U.S. earnings dropped by a whopping 74%, which … seems like a lot.
And while Sony proudly proclaimed that their vampire flick was the “#1 movie in the world.”
Morbius isn't number one movie in the world at this point, however, and this past weekend fell by 62% at the international box office. So it seems as though our national nightmare may be over – that is until the release of Morbius 2: Why Am I Still Pushing Jared Leto To the Bathroom in a Wheelchair?
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Top Image: Sony