We Dodged A TV Show Starring Michael Avenatti And Anthony Scaramucci
Of all the myriad characters the Trump presidency has thrust into the public eye, none have been more sleazily reptilian than Michael Avenatti and Anthony Scaramucci. Avenatti represented Stormy Daniels in her lawsuit against the president, and claimed he would run for the office himself before facing charges of extortion, fraud, embezzlement, and tax evasion. Scaramucci vomited out profanity and nonsense as the White House's shortest-tenured director of communications before somehow moving down a peg to Celebrity Big Brother 2. They have shown themselves to be lacking in both professional ability and basic human morality. So obviously someone floated the idea that they should star together on TV.
Jamie McCarthy/Getty ImagesWhich seems a little optimistic for two guys whose personalities feel like accidentally sticking your hand in that mystery puddle in the back of the fridge.
No, it wouldn't have been a reality show that accompanied our two lovable miscreants as they took on the most sordid nightlife that Hackensack, New Jersey has to offer. The concept that "prominent television agent" Jay Sures ran up the flagpole at CNN and MSNBC was that Avenatti and Scaramucci would face off and debate contentious issues of the day. It was much like the old show Crossfire, except both men would be firing blanks.
Alas, the Scum v. Scum extravaganza never graced the homes of the 200 or so viewers who wouldn't immediately change the channel. If for some reason you absolutely need more of Natty and The Mooch, you can still listen to Scaramucci's spectacularly uninformative podcast. And depending on the regulations wherever Avenatti gets sent to serve his potential 300-year sentence for multiple affronts to human decency, he might sketch you something on a napkin for like 20 bucks.
Candace Owens Started A "Blexit" Clothing Line, And Pretended Kanye West Designed It
In a 2018 attempt to break the lock Democrats have had on the African American vote for decades, Candace Owens started the "Blexit" movement. As the cursed name implies, she wants black Democrats to abandon the party and register Republican, because nothing says "compelling American political movement" like a reference to a British tragicomedy.
To promote it, Owens launched a Blexit clothing line, announcing that "Blexit is a renaissance and I am blessed to say that this logo, these colors, were created by my dear friend and superhero Kanye West. [West] has taken one of the boldest steps in America to open a conversation we have needed to have."
Shopblexit.com"Liberals can't bully me ... except into paying 36 bucks for this ugly-ass sweat shirt."