4

Elliot Ness' Life Fell Apart Post-Untouchables (Thanks To Booze)

The Untouchables is a crime drama about Elliot Ness (Kevin Costner) and his team of super-cops who take on Al Capone during Prohibition. At the end of the film, a journalist asks Ness what he'll do when Prohibition ends. His response: "I think I'll have a drink."

Well, Ness was definitely a man of his word. Within years of defeating the bootleggers, he became a hardcore alcoholic. It wasn't unusual for him to have 20 (or more!) drinks on a night out. After one such evening, he was involved in a hit-and-run incident which damaged his reputation and cost him his cushy job as a public safety director. Not surprising, as he'd clearly become a danger to it.

3

The Villain Of Gladiator Became A Literal God

In Gladiator, Emperor Commodus (Joaquin Phoenix) first kills his own father after overhearing an advisor telling him (quite rightly, it turns out) that his son is unfit to rule. Then he hands down a death sentence to the decorated general who would have replaced him, Maximus (Russell Crowe). He goes ahead and has Maximus' entire family killed as well, for good measure. Though Maximus escapes execution, he winds up in the hands of slavers, who force him to fight as some sort of Roman spear boxer (we forget the word for it). Maximus eventually takes on Commodus in a final showdown, and though it costs him his life, he emerges as the victor. He dies successful and beloved by his people, while Commodus is forgotten in the dirt.

Now, Maximus never existed, so you can't hold all those fictional deaths against the real Roman Emperor Commodus. But still, he was clearly an arrogant dick who was responsible for the wanton slaughter of both people and animals, as well as the total drain of Rome's treasury. Don't worry, though, he got his: After his death, Commodus went on to be deified.

DreamWorks PicturesPictured: a god

2

The Town In Erin Brockovich Only Got Worse After The Movie

In Erin Brockovich, our titular knight in shining miniskirt succeeds in bringing down the big bad Pacific Gas & Electric for polluting the small town of Hinkley, California with a dangerous chemical called chromium-6. She earns the downtrodden townsfolk a big financial payout, and the actress who played her earned a Best Actress Oscar.

Unfortunately, despite all of that, Hinkley would go on to sink to even more depressing depths. In the years following the film, chromium-6 actually became a lot more pervasive than it had been before the legal action took place. Brockovich herself recently lamented that the change she implemented is being undone by the people in power, and that the issues she highlighted over 20 years ago continue to persist.

Hinkley is now a virtual ghost town. People and businesses began fleeing the area en masse, and in 2012, Pacific Gas & Electric started buying Hinkley properties and demolishing them to prevent squatting. Apparently, destroying the town figuratively wasn't enough for these guys.

VOA/C. RichardIt doesn't really paint a picture of a rejuvenated population when the town wasn't even included in the last census.

1

For Many Survivors, The Sinking Of The Titanic Was Only The Start

Mere days after the survivors of the Titanic disaster arrived on dry land, they were dragged in front of the Senate for a series of intense hearings which aimed to figure out how the disaster occurred. It seems "iceberg" wasn't good enough for them. The process was naturally traumatic for many of the survivors, as they were forced to relive awful (and incredibly recent) experiences.

United States Senate Historical OfficeBefore large crowds of onlookers, naturally, because being grilled by the Senate isn't stressful enough on its own.

And they got off light (uh ... comparatively speaking). Six Chinese men who survived the sinking were detained upon arrival and then deported, barred from entering the U.S. due to the Chinese Exclusion Act, which had been in place since 1882. They were never heard from again. Not even Lemony Snicket could dream up such a succession of bad luck.