Pokemon Was Inspired By A Ton Of Ancient Monsters
For some of us, Pokemon brings back fond memories of childhood, Cartoon Network, and after-school card-trading sessions. For the rest of us, Pokemon conjures that one weekend in the summer of 2016 when we clocked more than 10 miles on our Fitbits for once. For anyone remotely familiar with Japanese mythology, Pokemon is a watered-down, cutesy version of the worst creatures humanity has ever conjured outside of fanfiction.
For example, foxy-looking Ninetales uses its glowing red eyes to look into your soul and read your mind. While that is obviously terrifying in a fluffy-tailed, vaguely sexual way, Japanese women would probably happily take it over the horrors that await them if they meet its inspiration, the kitsune. In some stories, this multi-tailed fox literally bores into you with its claws, usually in sensitive places like under your fingernails or through your boobs.
Utagawa Kuniyoshi, Nintendo
"How about I trap you in a ball, asshole?!"
Another seemingly innocent-looking Pokemon called Absol uses its horn to warn people about natural disasters like tsunamis and earthquakes. What? You didn't know there was a Weather Channel Pokemon? Where have you been?
Absol was probably inspired by the Chinese story of Bai Ze. This creature told the first Chinese emperor all about all 11,520 types of evil monsters in the world and how to fight them. And he looked like this:
Via Wikimedia Commons
Maybe this isn't the ideal source for monster-killing advice.