The character's muscular physique and lack of appropriate clothing make a lot more sense when you find out that, instead of creating an original Demolition Man toy series, Mattel cheaped out and literally repainted some old He-Man action figures. This was originally a guy called Tatarus, which is somehow less disturbing than "Edgar Friendly." We're gonna assume that Rob Schneider's action figure is just an even more punchable Orko.
Captain Hook (Hook) -- From Sad Old Man to Walking Armory
Steven Spielberg's Hook is the story of an elderly, balding amputee who is constantly terrorized by a gang of teenagers. The whole point of the movie is that we are now seeing Captain Hook through Peter Pan's adult eyes, and it's a pretty pathetic vision. That's why they got short, mumbling, 53-year-old Dustin Hoffman to play him and not Jean-Claude Van Damme or something. Hoffman's take on the character was less "terrifying pirate supervillain" and more "your old spinster aunt after a few drinks." So it was a little out of left field when the action figure turned Hook into a badass killing machine with giant blades coming out of every orifice.
You can also attach a crossbow to the sword that shoots bolts with ninja star heads.
While Hoffman was never topless on screen, it's probably safe to assume he didn't have crazy, rock-hard robot abs. Also, the movie was called Hook -- not Hook, Gun, Ax, Robot Sword, Assault Rifle, and Mechanical Dragon Claw. Though, we have to admit, we would totally go see that one.